Candid Comments

Jokes That I Don't Get

2012-02-12T10:46:00.000-08:00

Yes, I do not have the foggiest idea where all of these "I ran for president" jokes are coming from. It's just ridiculous. I never ran for president and never even thought about that. In fact, the one time that Steve Brown nominated me to run for something in high school, I immediately had my name erased from the blackboard because it would be too problematic for me to try to get elected in high school given all of the unfortunate circumstances of being in the wrong place at the wrong time, a white person temporarily displaced in a brown world or something like that. I would rather not run than be utterly humiliated by the tide of public opinion, now that's one way of looking at it. Later, after tenth grade Steve Brown moved back to Arizona and disappeared into the American landscape never to be heard from again. I probably should have had my name removed from the blackboard also at the Musician's Guild meeting because nobody elected me and also I never did anything to help with the talent show anyway because it was not my problem. So there is a positive side to not being elected. It is good not to be saddled with the opinions of the stupid public in my opinion. Like the Bible says in the Old Testament: "And every man did what was right in his own eyes." Now there is a recipe for anarchy and chaos, as any Sunday School teacher will tell you, and I specifically remember teachers at the little school emphasizing this point. You could give the people whatever they want and crown some powerful king but you might not like the results anyway, being chained into forced labor to fund the king's glory. Sometimes it is just as well to not be saddled with the problem because the solution you are seeking would only invite judgment and, anyway, it's not my problem.

Information Hoarders

2012-02-11T18:31:00.000-08:00

Yes, I really resent being thought of as the hoarder when we all know that Dauna was the one who had her fingers into everything and everyone and knew a lot of stuff about people that I have no idea how she got. I really don't know very much about those people. I never had a lot of connections to them and there is nothing there for me to go back to now. The very little information that I may be induced to recal would not be worth very much anyway so I fail to see any point in continuing these discussions. I really don't remember anything important.

Basketball Games

2012-02-10T06:52:00.000-08:00

I wonder what makes the wicked Hoskins brats and their bitchy sidekick Sherie Turnbull think that I would want to watch their disgusting display of midnight basketball? I had never even heard of that dubious sport before their impromptu performance at midnight during MK Retreat in Oklahoma. How shocking! Obviously there is a lot of filth and sleaze percolating in their sick little minds. At first I really didn't believe such a thing could be happening. It seemed unreal, like people were just lying or exaggerating something, but no, it was true and that is why, as I walked toward the gymnasium, people were streaming out of the gymnasium with expressions of shock and horror on their faces. So finally I turned back and returned to the dorm and did not try to enter the gymnasium. The camp counselors are dealing with the situation and there is nothing that we can do about that, like someone said. Everyone has been ordered to evacuate the gymnasium while they "counsel" the three of them. She was an MK from Africa. That is about all that I remember said about her. She was removed from the camp immediately and no one saw her after that. Anyway, this explains why nobody wants to have anything to do with the wicked Hoskins boys. This proves maybe that rich people are more wicked and evil than us normal poor people who play by the rules. This explains why it is better to avoid rich people whenever possible because they can really mess up your head and then they will be living it up high on the hog while you are left holding the bag for them when actually it should be the other way around. That is why it really is sick the way the Hoskins are demanding my head on a platter when actually it is no my fault that their sons are wicked and worthless. I don't know anything about it and it is not my problem.

The TV Whiners

2012-02-09T17:52:00.000-08:00

It is so ridiculous the way those TV whiners sit there on their TV sets moaning and groaning and complaining about how everyone is out to get them. They are so paranoid that it make us want to vomit. So, like, do they think that I have nothing else to think about than their monotonous monologues? Like, do they think that nobody does their homework or their job and everyone just stands there watching what they are doing. Actually, most of the people on the planet are not in league with blithering spy-idiots Mark and Carol so we have no clue what their problem is. Carol had formerly worked for the TV people and said she was sick of hearing about all their personal problems from Jan so she quit and went to work for Hermano Pablo. That's about all I remember about that.
Sharon said that Mark and Carol were fired for doing something rather illegal. They had wired the building and had accumulated all kinds of notes from tapped phone conversations that were stashed in a file cabinet in a back room, maybe in the bottom drawer where earlier, before I had quit and found another job, I used to store the corrected lesson papers for the correspondence course that I was in charge of correcting and mailing out the next lesson among other things. Ok, so that was a weird conversation that I had with Sharon. I cannot imagine what Mark and Carol were doing and I no longer care to get back in touch with them, a thought that is not neceessary for me to verbalize. After all, Carol was quite nasty to me after she learned that I was in college with her former piano student Debbie Tracy and said some things about how wonderful she is and about how they have no use for me or something like that. So, like, Ok, like, those people always hated me anyway. I really need to get another job where I can meet other people and go other places where I can make friends who are my friends, not persons who are actually the property lock stock and barrel of the Debbie-Sharon-Rose-Carol-Jan gang, as if there were some kind of contest going on. Actually it was Lynda Botsford who had some sort of cat fight with Debbie Tracy in the presence of Mrs. Hummel maybe, I think. Lynda said something about it but did not explain clearly. The nature of their disagreement was not clear to me. Perhaps Dauna knows more about that than I do. It is also not clear to me whether Dauna and Debbie also had some sort of cat fight also or whether that tidbit is actually just another red herring bait dangled there, luring me to unload my opinions about them. It would probably be better for me to resist temptation and avoid saying what I really think about her. After all, I owe nothing to Debbie. She got paid for her piano accompaniment duties long ago so there is nothing else to say about that. Everybody hated my stage presentation so I can take a clue.

Philippians 3:19

2012-02-08T18:32:00.000-08:00

It is really not my job to pound on these whiny fascist dogs like Robbie and Noel but the Bible applies and so obviously this is already in the script anyway. In fact this is their whole point. Although it is never said, we all know that the TV upppity-ups are big-time whiners. That is because their god is their belly. Far be it from them to forego certain alcoholic beverages that satisfy and quench their own consumptive carnal pleasures, even if ministerial license requirements technically forbid it, because, when it all comes down to it, they only care about earthly things. If you are not a minister then nobody can fire you from your pastoral position. You can just own your own ministry organization so nobody is able to take you to account for your drunken rages and fire you. Yes, they try to make us feel stupid for not going with the flow, and some of us may have our moments of being suckered by their devilishly clever tactics and manipulation and our thoughts get jumbled on this point, but anyway, actually, when all is said and done, they are the guilty ones who are trying to cover their tracks and make it seem like the rules are stupid and that we are all wrong for being too persnickety about rules. And which rules are important anyway? Just because Debbie Tracy doesn't like me and always hated my guts, that's not a rule. The rules are determined by the school or denominational organization or God, not by the whining of dumpy dogs like Debbie Tracy or Dauna Kammerer. It was not my job to go around putting the dogs back in their cages. So you might be able to get away with whatever you want and you might have to pay for it later but it is not my problem as long as the denomination basically agrees on what the rules are and ought to be. But if the uppity-ups aren't even playing by the rules anymore, then what is our reason for being? Maybe they would like to change the rules but what kind of church would that be, anyway? Catholic? Anglican? Whatever. They have plenty of other choices but then we wouldn't really be Pentecostal anymore. We would just be a lot of lukewarm nothingness to be spewed out of the mouth.

Noel

2012-02-08T15:54:00.000-08:00

And who is this filthy dirty fascist slut Noel Baca who married into the Barth clan up in Northern California? Obviously, she is a worthless piece of garbage who does not deserve the slightest regard or respect from us. What an utterly rude and obnoxious way to introduce herself to the distant relatives! Hopefully, Noel's wicked schemes will go down in flames as being utterly undeserving of any respect from intelligent Christian Americans such as myself. We have zero desire to get in touch with those stupid people. If they want to mail the paperwork we are willing to take a look at it and see what they are talking about but otherwise we remain completely unimpressed with the blithering idiot cousins of San Jose.

Robbie the Fascist Swine

2012-02-08T09:07:00.000-08:00

I think that Robbie has a lot of nerve trying to offer me a job when he has declared himself an enemy of everything that I believe in and care about. He chose for himself a whiny Italian-Latina bimbo wife and placed himself squarely in the category of fascist loser burning in fascist hell so I think that he has to pay the price. He cannot just dump all this Olympic sports garbage on me and expect an intelligent public to care about his not-so-illustrious career. Just being an MK is not enough. He has to assume responsibility for the emptiness of his sick head and the futile stupidity of the direction his worthless life has taken and stop trying to blame it all on me. Robbie cannot expect me to just hand over my heritage when obviously he has done nothing to deserve it.

Speaking of Mental Retards

2012-02-07T16:02:00.000-08:00

I seem to recall someone saying that mental retard Debbie Tracy is babysitting mental retard Heather Wilson. Now there is a case of the blind leading the blind. Ha ha ha! We all know that Debbie Tracy is one of weirdest psychos on the planet so obviously she would not be babysitting my children assuming I ever had any, which I don't and neither does she, but if I did, well ... obviously someone already said this so there is no need for me to go around repeating the contents of your empty head, whoever you are, mother of the Antichrist or something like that. Enough said about that, not that I would ever think to say this but since these words have been placed in my mouth for delivery, I find myself obliged to vomit them back in your face.

Scripted Lines

2012-02-06T07:10:00.000-08:00

As per the script concocted by those dirty dogs, I am now supposed to run around screaming and yelling and trashing that Dumpy Dog Debbie Tracy and her whiny dog friends Sharon Whetstone and Rose Wilson. My abuse of Debbie Tracy will garner sympathy for her and thus Warren will be won back to her side, as if I care about that. And when did those people ever have anything to do with me? My existence is basically unknown to them so nothing that I say matters in their world so there is no reason for me to carry out this scripted exercise in futility. And besides, I never did have any respect for those nasty bitches. Were they expecting me to be impressed with their mechanistic ability to perform the role of player piano despite the lack of any signs of intelligence in their empty brains? Sorry that I cannot oblige but just because they are a couple of years older than me, that does not mean that I have any desire to be caught having to converse with them. Besides, I never watched Diana Ross and the Supremes on TV, never attended the Barry Manilow concert, so I have no clue what they are talking about. Don't they realize how stupid they sound and that they really are supposed to keep their mouths shut and carry our orders from me and nothing more? What Debbie wants counts for nothing because she is just a Warren's stupid dog. Besides, they are so worldly and decadent it makes us want to vomit watching their display of glittery decadence but we have to remember that they have very powerful connections so we dare not cross them. After all, Debbie Tracy's parents are powerful faculty members who could make our lives miserable, Sharon's parents pastor a church, and, needless to say, Rose Wilson is one of the Wilsons who are the most horrible powermongers on the planet as everyone knows. It is better not to have any fellowship or ever have a conversation or encounter with any Wilson person because they are horrible people who think everything is just all about them. So basically those people are worthless to me and will have no place or role in my future life whatever that might be. College was not supposed to be like that. I was not expecting college to such a worthless wasteland. Conventional wisdom says that your college friends are supposed to be important components of your professional network in adult life but that was not the case for me. College was nothing, unfortunately, but it is not necessarily anyone's fault. It was just the system.

Roasting the Rainbow Riff Raff

2012-02-05T11:13:00.000-08:00

It really is not necessary for me to point out that there would be no reason for us to mix and mingle with the vile wicked mafia riff raff delivery stooges of the Rainbow pizza restaurant on Market Street, not to be confused with those other reputable pizzerias that we patronize. We hope those pizza stooges get saved someday but we are not personally called to a ministry of pizza delivery in the San Francisco region and thus, basically, it is not our problem. If you cannot offer free delivery of the pizza to my front door then obviously you are not qualified to open your mouth in my presence because, basically, you are a clueless idiot, just a whiny tempest in a teapot. That is about all that I have to say about that, basically, because no other evidence to suggest any sign of intelligence in your empty head has as yet presented itself to us and thus we are completely unimpressed with your blithering idiot presentation.

Speaking Of Sarah

2012-02-03T10:38:00.000-08:00

Yes, it is interesting that Sarah Kugler's name appears in so many of the books written by early Pentecostal missionaries to China, what few books there are, two or three, whereas hundreds of other missionaries are not mentioned in the Dixon and Haist books. This may give the unintended impression that Sarah K. is the only game in town but that would not be exactly right. Sarah has her significant place in history and her voice and that is nice but there are other things to say about Pentecostal missionaries in China. Sarah may have gone the UPC route but others took cover in other denominational organizations and so there is not one "Yellow Brick Road" to China, so to speak. There may be a lot more to the story than just Sarah and her little dog Toto but very little was written down, unfortunately, so the picture is very blurry. Sarah may remember with glowing nostalgia the early days when everyone agreed with each other back in the Garden of Eden but those days are long gone and can never be again. We just have to agree to disagree on certain points. We don't really have any use for this argument, to tell the truth, if they are just going to be that way.

Food Fights

2012-02-02T16:57:00.000-08:00

Overdosing on sugar might not be the healthiest thing but at least I was never responsible for instigating cafeteria food fights. In my opinion, those guys get way too aggressive in slapping each other with pieces of cake or pie or walking away and leaving piles of slop all over the table but, well, am I the police? Is it my job to regulate and remember the names of all those food flingers? You could always ask Dauna. She is one of those who has a way of remembering all that trivia. I just wasn't paying that much attention.

Clarification

2012-01-30T16:40:00.000-08:00

To clarify, it was my sister who took organ lessons from Mark Thallander at SCC the year she was there. I never took any lessons from Mark. I vaguely remember seeing his face around campus but I don't think we ever met. If I really wanted to take organ lessons from Mark I am sure that would have been a good time to do it but anyway I was never interested in learning organ. All those foot pedals and switches and bells and whistles, it's not really my kind of thing. Organs are nice in their places but you cannot pack an organ like that in a suitcase and take it with you. Those things are attached and go with the building.

Connections

2012-01-30T16:31:00.000-08:00

Am I just dreaming this or am I remembering Joanne Keller, the secretary at Lockman Foundation in La Habra, Calif., telling me that she had some connection to Dina Knox of Yuma, Ariz.? Her husband is Dina Knox's father, a second marriage of elderly people obviously. I don't really remember this but maybe there was a connection.

Let Them Eat Crow

2012-01-29T11:09:00.000-08:00

Maggie Brass was a Native American of the Crow tribe, living on the Crow Reservation in Montana. She and two other ladies made the trip to Los Angeles to visit the Azusa Mission in about 1909. Mrs. Brass did not speak English, but the ladies were mightily touched by the revival and brought Pentecost back to Montana. Today Maggie's granddaughter is married to the pastor of Arrow Creek Christian Center in Pryor, Montana. (borrowed from AzusaStreet.org)

On Stephen Speirs Craig

2012-01-28T10:24:00.000-08:00

Who is this Stephen Speirs Craig who wrote for Trust magazine in 1910 and 1911 and thereabouts? He was originally a Canadian pastor, Presbyterian who is thought to have worked at Zion Congregational Church in Toronto, Ontario, some time around the turn of the century. He apparently turned Pentecostal later and emigrated to the United States in 1915 and worked some time for the Duncan sisters in Rocheter, New York.

Interestingly, my great-great-great-grandmother was Ana Eliza Speers. Well, you know, spellings vary widely on these ancient census documents so who's to say how her name was supposed to be spelled? Anyway, Ana Eliza Speers was a Canadian living in Ontario. She married John Levins and had many children there in Canada, one of whom was the father of my great-grandmother. However, whether she, and thus we, ever had any kinship connection to this Stephen Speirs Craig is nigh impossible to say for sure, and even if it were so, it would not explain how my great-grandparents became Pentecostals all on their own living out there in California within easy driving or walking or bus or tram distance to the Azusa Street church where things really got rolling.

Anyway, the only Craig persons I know of here in Florida are definitely NOT related to me, thank heaven. Nor would they have a clue about the Speirs, as neither would I, come to think of it, not that it matters in the least.

The fact remains that my hand was pierced by an actual African spear that my sister and I were fighting over in San Bernardino, moving into a house formerly occupied by missionaries to Africa who had left behind some artifacts, not that I remember anything about that. There is obviously no connection there to Pentecostal Canada for those of us who know how to spell.

On the Prince of the Air

2012-01-28T10:03:00.000-08:00

The article by Stephen Speirs Craig is an interesting take on "Satanic Strategy" and how the Prince of the Air is strategically opposed to Christian revivals today.

To clarify, Craig says: The word 'deep' should be Abyss." (Obviously he is not saying that everything must be superficial or that everything 'deep' is hellish. This is a specific reference to Luke 8:31 in which the original Greek word apparently does mean hell or the bottomless pit or Abyss or something like that and is sometimes translated more specifically. The demons cast out of the Gadarene man are the ones who are afraid of the "deep," in case you had not noticed. The demons are the ones always looking for something new and novel to keep them entertained. Craig makes the following points:

1. Satan's new brand of fanaticism aids his quest to injure the cause of Truth.

a. Intellectual fanatic: Obsessed with new interpretations and novel doctrines.
b. Emotional fanatic: Revels in manifestations.
c. Spiritist: Persons with an affinity for evil spirits or demons.

2. Denominational resistance to the Holy Spirit and the Pentecostal movement.

3. Individual resistance to the Holy Spirit and the Pentecostal movement.

"Alas! What shall they do when they stand before the 'Bema' face to face with the ten thousand whom the Great Shepherd has gathered into the fold from India, China, Japan, Africa, and the round globe as the fruit of this movement?.... And how will they conceal their astonishment and remorse when they see the jeweled crowns placed on the heads of the Pentecostal overcomers? Let the curtain fall for the present and let that Day of Days give its own answer. Methinks there will be sorrow in Heaven that Day."

Stereotypical Pianists

2012-01-24T14:52:00.000-08:00

Yes, Geraldeane "Dina" Knox is one of those church pianists who fits the stereotype that is being bashed by those little boys who are trying to reform the Pentecostal reality. She is a worst-case scenario to them, being extremely overweight, single, and sort of obnxiously overbearing in a way so that obviously people are just going to leave her be. She actually was a very nice sixth grade teacher and a good piano teacher for that level but, anyway, not someone that I personally would want to emulate or to be like in the future of adult life, thanks anyway, not that I would ever say this in real life. But, anyway, the Pentecostal reformers have kicked all the single women church pianists to the curb to make room for young guys with drums and guitars. I am just saying the facts. It wasn't really my plan but sometimes one just has to go with the flow when these little boys are axing the furniture because obviously they have been programmed to think that old-time music is boring and that everything has to be electrified to the hilt, lots of screaming and bluesy. Sad that there is no music appreciation in church these days, just boring repetitive chanting of the mind-numbing variety. Maybe eventually we can get our brains back into the mix and get some real music that is not just a lot of pumped up robotics but I might not live that long so I am not going to hold my breath.

Danny Boy

2012-01-24T12:22:00.000-08:00

Truth be told, there is not much place in my life for second or third cousin Daniel. He has his place in Pasadena and he does not need anything from me. I fail to understand why I should pretend to be connected to Daniel just because we met once or twice at family funerals. I vaguely remember that at the funeral he talked about seeing his redheaded distant cousins, my sister and I, when we first met as children on some occasion that I do not recall, and it made him feel better about being a redhead because he saw that it was not only him. There were quite a few of us in the family tree, including three Butterfields not to mention other occurrences. It's just one of those things that you never know. It doesn't appear in every generation, only now and then. No one can say whether their children will be redheaded or not. But if you do have them, you should not make them feel like they are from some other planet. I vaguely remember Irene Cool, a co-worker at Lockman's, mentioning that her niece was a redhead and got way too much attention from strangers, and that something needed to be done to put her in her place. That is the usual treatment that redheads get from certain people and it is hard for others to understand what this does to your head but whatever. It's just who you are, it's not like you are trying to dye your hair red. If you are like Daniel, you are just a truck driver who works for a plant nursery or something like that. You could have gone to college and done a lot more but you took it too personal when people put you down and you forgot something and started thinking that making money was more important so now you'll never catch up. But at least it's better than being a blonde like Geraldeane Knox who plays piano well by ear and yet weighs maybe 500 pounds by now and has to wear a tent, I would imagine, because she always did eat voraciously.

In the Kitchen With Dina

2012-01-24T10:23:00.000-08:00

Geraldeane Knox of Yuma, Arizona, was my piano teacher when I was in sixth grade and she also taught at the little school. We used to sing that song of her although the pronunciation doesn't really fit. That was nice of her to stop by the college when I was there and take me home with her for a week to Yuma, Arizona, during Easter Week. An interesting drive across the desert and then a few days there at her house meeting the girls who were her foster daughters in a way, a visit to the local fair at which the person in charge of the sort-of-like-a-ferris wheel forgot to turn off the machine, then finally returning by bus to downtown Santa Ana from where I had to call the college to see if someone could come and find me because in those days I had no idea how to get around. Overall a sort of blah and depressing time and we have not heard from her since then. Sorry if I sound ungrateful for the vacation experience but things just weren't the same in Arizona. Or was I visiting Yula-land? I am starting to wonder. I never had any idea of the existence of Samuel Longwell's daughter so I can't really comment on that point. I just don't fit into the Arizona picture, only passing through.

The Grace Of Patience

2012-01-23T14:27:00.000-08:00

And just because the lady in the article "The Grace of Patience" said that she had no joy in the Lord later because she was not willing to obey the Lord and let her reputation go, that does not mean that losing one's reputation is a joyful and exciting experience or that there is any reward for willfully dashing one's reputation on the rocks just to prove some stupid point, quite the contrary, not that I had ever heard of this publication until recently. Losing one's reputation is not a joyful thing at all, as I can personally attest. And yet if the Lord wants to take my reputation, I suppose that there is nothing I can do about it and neither do I see any joyful fruit at the end of this exercise in futility carried out just so that, too, you can make some mysterious point about "Trust" magazine or something like that, although it is actually "Voice" magazine that great-grandmother mentions reading in her dairies, not that all of this makes any sense. I am just saying.

Blackmail Charges

2012-01-23T14:09:00.000-08:00

And who exactly can I charge with extortion and blackmail? I have received the message that I must conform to the collective or be destroyed. And yet what they want me to do is entirely destructive of my own self interests, which sort of goes contrary to the U.S. constitution. Do I have no inalienable rights? I must do whatever they want in order to keep the peace. Whatever they want is not exactly clear. It is a secret path to the temple of mysteries. Yet mine is not to question why. Mine is but to do or die, as the saying goes. So just because on the airplane some man sitting next to my sister asked if I was the appointed chaperone, as if I were only the maid, that does not mean that I was the maid originally. It is my sister who enlisted in the Freemason club and has all these weird people working everything her way. Just because my cousin David, at maybe age 12, and myself were improvising and not going by the appointed script in the children's book selected by my sister, that does not mean that we are both queer. This later elaboration and embellishment comes from my sister's Wicked Witch Whiners who have devoted all their energies to making my life as miserable as possible. Just because they hate the Beatles music, that does not mean that I must remain unaware of the culture around me and let those little brats tell me everything, as if their ignorant opinions were the only thing that mattered in this respect. Just because you have the power to destroy me, that does not mean that you are right or that your opinion is true, only that you are cruel and despicable beyond belief. That is the only thing that all of this proves.

Data Analysis To Paralysis

2012-01-22T15:41:00.000-08:00

I vaguely remember Sharon Turner telling me about how Mark Carpenter (or was his name Mark Brown?) was fired after it was learned that he had wired the entire building and was eavesdropping on telephone conversations. That was shocking news. I imagine that Mark's name is now MUD everywhere and I will never again have to listen to his whiny tirades over lunch in which he complains about everything and takes on way more than he can rightfully chew. I would not want to be trying on his icky shoes, that's for sure. It just goes to show that just because a guy is smart enough to wire the entire building, that does not mean that he has the emotional maturity and intelligence necessary to properly analyze the data gathered. I would not give two cents for Mark's idiot opinion about me or about anyone else so I imagine that telling Sharon that I knew nothing about it is all I would ever need to say about that. The evidence of their incredible stupidity speaks for itself. There is nothing more that I would need to add to that.

Doc?

2012-01-22T11:42:00.000-08:00

I don't remember ever meeting my uncle but I did know my cousins and I feel sorry for them. They are so ignorant and yet completely unaware of their own ignorance. Although their Dad was nicknamed 'Doc' he was not really a doctor, only a dentist. Of course, when one is trying to keep the peace among family members one is unable or extremely reluctant to describe these relatives in full detail, not that I would know anything about Doc. It's just that the evidence would suggest that nothing of value can be ascertained from exploring the Doc connections or trying to tell them anything. They have to figure it out for themselves because they won't take it from me, obviously. My Andrews cousins, bless their pathetic little hearts, spent way too much time reading books about how Martians built the Egyptian pyramids and other bizarre and unexplainable theories of science fiction. Yes, I enjoyed watching the occasional episode of Star Trek and Wild Wild West together with them but Ray Bradbury had a lot of problems. "Chariots of the Gods: Unsolved Mysteries of the Past" by Erich von Daniken is not a book that I actually remember reading. I do remember listening to David talk about it maybe and saw the movie. So while the Andrews cousins might have some good things to say about dental care, it is not like they would have a clue about reality just because they all happened to live in the Bay Area at about the same time. My Dad was the ordained minister, not Doc, so obviously my Dad would know a lot more about Christianity than Doc, not that we are trying to stage a contest on this point. It's just that you are not going to reach heaven by flying saucer. Life is short. Make your peace with God while you can because it won't be long.

Piano Lessons

2012-01-20T18:20:00.000-08:00

I wonder what makes all these piano teachers think that I would still angling for more piano lessons? Even if I could afford it, I wouldn't really enjoy it. I would just hate it and find some excuse to quit and get lost trying to find your tiny little Bellflower house again just to be beaten on again because I cannot stand it anymore. I want to scream. I hate making stupid mistakes and getting screamed at. I want to do something that I am good at for a change, something where I have the upper hand, something at which I would be successful for a change. For all of these reasons, I never want to see you again. I lost your phone number and I forgot your name. How did I do that? I don't remember. And anyway, just because you can play piano, that does not mean that you can have a coherent thought about me. I could try to explain but you would never be able to understand.

Tithes

2012-01-20T12:46:00.000-08:00

I fully agree that I should always pay my tithes and catch up later if I fell behind. Nevertheless, I do not agree that tithes must go to the televangeliests. It is my decision to make but I tend to think that the local church is the place for tithes assuming that you attend a local church. If all tithes are paid to television then there will be no local church for you. You are just a mass media believer of the generic variety. You will not get anything more than the basics from TV. For the masses of ignorant couch potato cash machines it really does not matter what you do. If you so like, the TV ministries will do all of your Christian charity duties for you and all you have to do is mail the check or pick up the phone and contribute or something like that. However, if I prefer to own my own life and make my decisions, then televangelists and/or Hoskins have no reason to be smashing my brains on the pavement to try to wring some dollars and cents out of me. They already have entire vaults crammed full of the accumulated wealth of millions of people so there is no reason for them to have any interest in the tithing choices that I might make as an individual. The televangelists always say those things every day on TV about contributing money because what else would they have to talk about otherwise and also it is true as a general principle that you should tithe off your income but you don't necessarily have to give it to them. You could also give it to the local church or some other non-broadcasting parachurch ministry. It is your decision to make. I am not telling you where to mail the check. If you have a lot of surplus money to burn you could also donate money to TV if you want to but it is your decision to make. It is not like the money belongs to me, or even to you. All good things come from the Father in heaven anyway and you can't take it with you. Life is short.

Copyright Issues

2012-01-20T10:14:00.000-08:00

Who can I sue to collect for damages from all of these copyright infringements? Take for example the misuse of great-grandmother's diaries. All kinds of bizarre theories have been taken from facts that did not warrant much of anything. So that's nice that great-grandmother gave Pop's ring to my Dad's Uncle Joe so that he could have a keepsake of his father. Uncle Joe had a lot of problems and great-grandmother was just trying to be nice and comforting. So I don't see anything wrong with that. However, it does not mean that Uncle Joe ever spent any time in China. The Hawaii years (1930s) mean nothing to me. I have never been there and will not be buying a plane or boat ticket anytime in the near future. We have no contact with Uncle Joe's family. They have a lot of problems. Smoking causes lung cancer but that is not my problem. So who am I going to be able to sue to get all of this mess straightened out when nobody will talk? Everyone just plays little games that mean nothing to me. Obviously, in this family of syndicated criminals everyone is guilty of something and nobody wants to admit it. Everyone is complicit in having twisted the truth so badly out of shape that no one remembers anymore what really happened. The Lord was supposed to rescue me and right now, this very day, would be a very good time to do that, but everyone already knows that nothing good is ever going to happen to me. I don't deserve anything. I never did what I was supposed to do. I never did anything right. I made too many excuses. I made too many mistakes. Therefore I don't see why there is any more need for me to explain this obvious point. If I had a hammer maybe I could use it to kill myself because that's about all I would be able to do with it.

Art Work

2012-01-19T11:08:00.000-08:00

We recently were invited to go to a home and destroy their idol god. They had him in a little house in the corner of the kitchen. I pulled this dead god down, house and all. There were three tin cups in which they burned incense for this god. They also had a cup of wine beneath this paper god. We poured the wine out and gave the woman her cup and took the god and his house into the front room, where I stamped the house to pieces before the heathen company that was gathered together to see what we would do. We tore the god up in their presence, then we preached to them the true God and Jesus Christ our Lord. The woman in this home had already turned to God. Yet after they are saved, a relic of fear often remains to destroy these gods themselves. One more, a worshiper of the moon, has also turned to the Lord, now worshiping the true God.

This incident reported in 1914 is probably not referring to any work of art. I seriously doubt that this "paper god" torn to pieces by my great-grandfather is a reference to my aesthetically pleasing resume printed on the recommended quality paper, dazzling white space separating the perfectly indented paragraphs, indeed such a lovely sight to behold even if my enemies would only trample it to pieces to serve their own political vendetta purposes. Incidentally, neither is this a reference to Uncle Art. No, as some say, the paper "god" was probably just some cheaply produced, ugly thing marketed by some unscrupulous Chinese shaman. We are not saying that the shaman was not making a fortune selling these paper "gods" to the naive and credulously ignorant heathens of China. We are not saying that a massive number of Chinese conversions to Christianity would not seriously jeopardize the livelihood of said Chinese idol crafters and vendors. Still, your sick attachment to these paper "gods" is an infection of the culture, not a sign of health. Can you even imagine what a healthy culture would be like when you have never lived without idols crowding around on every side? And if these idols were aesthetically pleasing and artistically amazing creations, would that make them acceptable to Christians? No, not really, because this is not about art. It is about idols. I could say more about this but then I would just go on forever.

Killers

2012-01-18T14:44:00.000-08:00

Speaking of killers, you are the one who defended the idea of knocking off Fidel Castro. I had never even thought of that when you were polishing hot guns. You are the Italian mafia hitman who knocked off Baptist missionary John Birch, not me. My great-grandparents were long gone from China when the events of World War II unfurled so it is exceedingly difficult, much more difficult than you had at first imagined, for you to try to dump me and my family into the same category as those mafia crime family members implicated in the John Birch Society scam. We do feel sorry for those Italian mafia killers but it is bizarre the way they so fanatically promote their own worthiness that it makes us want to vomit. I do agree on that point.

Copyright Permissions

2012-01-18T11:30:00.000-08:00

I remember that while I was at Regent University a Christian newspaper in Atlanta, Georgia, reprinted my article from the student newspaper without asking for permission. At least they attached my name to it which was nice. I felt sort of flattered that they had liked my article enough to reprint it. Nevertheless, our editor in chief Katherine Pyle was appalled that they would reprint our stuff without asking for permission. She wrote a huge legal treatise on the subject and addressed this to the Atlanta newspaperman. I was asked to sign on to that so I did because back in those days I tended to imagine that editor knows best. However, knowing what I know now, I tend to think that Katherine perhaps overreacted a little bit. Sometimes it is better to exhaust more diplomatic tactics first and reserve legal action for the measure of last resort rather than burn all one's bridges in advance. That's my opinion but no one really asked me.

Talent Show Issues

2012-01-18T06:56:00.000-08:00

Yes, I vaguely remember in college there was a talent show of which I remember very little. I don't really know those people. Just because we attended the same college, that does not mean that we were ever part of the same social circle. They already had their clique and no time or inclination to include other people like me. So just because I observed Ron Aguilera and Sharon Whetstone doing their Sonny and Cher act, that does not mean that I ever met them in real life. I fulfilled my assigned role singing in the choir and there is nothing more to tell about the talent show other than what Lynda said.

Lynda said that Ron is from Riverside and that is all I know about him. I do remember driving through the rugged terrain outside of Riverside and seeing many large rocks on which people have engraved all kinds of graffiti. However, we never paused to ponder the significance of "Kilroy was here" and similar messages. We have other place to go and other things to do so. I imagine that someone will do that but it's not my job.
Lynda said that there was a lawyer in the audience who created a huge fuss about copyright issues. Admission was charged and yet they had not paid a fee to the agency that collects artist royalties, ASCAP or something like that, to make sure they are legally entitled to be singing all those copyrighted songs borrowed from TV and radio. I don't really remember hearing how that was resolved, just that there was some kind of fuss about it. I was never involved in organizing the talent show so I really don't know anything about that.

Black vs. White

2012-01-17T09:34:00.000-08:00

Yes, that is so weird the way they are trying to pretend that all white Pentecostals are from Kansas and all black Pentecostals are from Southern California, as if there were not any white people present at Azusa Street and as if only the black part of it matters. Sure, the Pentecostal movement was very integrated at its starting point, shockingly so for Jim Crow days, but anyway it was mostly the white Pentecostals who went out as missionaries and rarely the black Pentecostals for various reasons, not that it matters now or not that we can rewrite history now in this regard. We can only look forward to what is to come, for example, the Second Coming of Christ. Back in the old days, those were different times. There might not have been an Azusa Street if there had not been a Kansas, and yet Charles of Kansas was not able to continue running the show later in Southern California because no single person or state can run the show, not even Missouri. If Kansas' Charles, a white supremacist of the extreme variety, had been in charge he would have dampened the Spirit even sooner, because Kansas obviously was not responsible for the increase. Anyway, the Kingdom of God is not a matter of geographical boundaries. We have no need of whiny Kansas prairie dogs to tell us where to go. The joke about Springfield being the Emerald City does not work, not only because actually Seattle is informally dubbed the Emerald City, and not Springfield, a city not located in Kansas, but also because Seattle was not really the crossroads of anything much in terms of Pentecostal missionary history, mostly just another city for people to pass through after unloading from their ships docking at the port in Victoria, Vancouver, Canada. Sarah Kugler, for example, the famous single-woman missionary who later married Daniel Sheets, not to be confused with my second or third cousin, and whose photograph appears in the family collection as an acquaintance of the great-grandparents, often docked in Canada upon arrival from the Orient but apparently spent very little time in that country, soon beating a direct path to the United States, which is home for a lot of American missionaries who obviously are U.S. citizens and not Canadians. In the age before airplanes, Sarah would have traveled by car, bus, or train to her home state of Kansas, a square block on the U.S. map through which I have driven only once, although she also apparently also lived some time in Arizona, another block on the U.S. map in which I have spent very little time only passing through. It is probably safe to say that Seattle was not an Emerald City for Kugler as it also is not the Emerald City for the vast majority of Pentecostal Christians who have never been there and don't know anything about it. Nevertheless, just because Kugler was a Kansas Pentecostal and acquainted with lots of other Pentecostal missionaries and mentioned in many books, that does not mean that she was later a minister with the Assemblies of God due to doctrinal confusions. Neither does this mean that Pentecostals have any use or need for an Emerald City of the Frank Baum variety. We all know that Frank was a Kansas atheist or agnostic or something like that and that his whimsical novel cannot be regarded as a textbook in the theological sense, just a sort of humorous and entertaining parody of Depression era migrations from small farm towns of Americana to big industrial cities. It doesn't have very much to say about Pentecostalism, at least not seriously speaking. This explains why these nasty Kansas prairie dogs Sharon and Sharon and Jan have nothing intelligent to say to us in any serious sense. Just as in days of old, we see that Kansas folks think they know everything but really don't have a clue about who I am and cannot be taken seriously without serious risk to the life of the Spirit which is the heart of the matter. Without the Holy Spirit at the heart of the matter, everything is just vanity of vanities, obviously, and there just isn't any reason for being. So obviously we have no need of this Bob to explain to us this glaringly obvious, basic point because everybody already knows this anyway. Shutting down the life to explain this point is sort of like throwing out the baby with the bath water. A dead life is just not worth living.

No Place For Me

2012-01-15T10:40:00.000-08:00

There really is no place for me, not to be confused with that song "No Room in the Inn." There just is no place for me in this world and in society. Society is corrupt anyway, which is always the easy answer to literature questions, so it's not like I care very much about that anymore. In real life I was supposed to get married and be a wife and mother but my plans never go the way I want, obviously. Mr. Right never made his appearance in my life. Instead, someone else wrote a book in which I was cast, for some vague mysterious reason, as a high-powered single-woman evangelist. I have no idea who wrote this book or what they were thinking. God never called me to do that, nor does it fit my experience and personality. I don't think we ever met. So while I could try to pretend to perform this assigned role, I would probably just fail anyway because it is not really who I am. It would just be another joke that someone unknown person is trying to play on me. I do believe in the importance of the Great Commission, but also many are called and few are chosen. I wasn't chosen to be one of them so there is no reason to condemn me for that. There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, as Romans 8:1 says, which means all Christian, not only the high-powered televangelists and ministry gurus.

Risk Taking

2012-01-14T11:54:00.000-08:00

Yes, I get really annoyed about Bobby and those guys harassing me and saying I don't take enough risks and should not be afraid, like it was OK for the Hoskins to run Vida Publishers into the ground financially to subsidize their personal ministry projects because as they say nothing is ever accomplished when playing by the rules, not that I would really know anything about that or what exactly they are trying to say. I was gone by the time the gang of lowly office staff banded together and sent some sort of letter confronting the Hoskins about the rumored secret money. No one has ever really explained to me exactly what happened or why I should care or what was the nature of the deal that they forged later and why I seem to be on the losing end of it when it doesn't have anything to do with me. I can't afford to take that kind of financial risk. If I did that I would just lose, probably be fired or something like that. If I borrowed all that money I would just be hung out to dry, left to forage for my dinner from the garbage bins, picketing for pocket change on the highway bypasses of the world. Only rich people can afford to take that kind of risk and obviously I am not that rich.

Literature Track

2012-01-13T15:14:00.000-08:00

Notwithstanding all this enforced commentary about literature Spanish and otherwise, I am not very interested in discussing whether the Christian University in El Salvador has a literature track or not. I am sort of get a clue that some people wanting to stir up some discussion on this point but I never really asked and it is really none of my business what they do. Within the limits set by their accreditation agency, in my opinion they are entitled to do whatever they want even if that means not having any literature classes if that is allowed, which might seem weird but lots of technically oriented schools are missing a literature emphasis so I think that is something they have to figure out for themselves. Even if they had a Spanish literature track, how would that fit into a Christian context when so much Spanish literature of recent decades is of a decidedly anti-Christian and Marxist orientation? It would be sort of interesting to see what they would do with that but it is not that would ever be my job, myself not being even remotely qualified and besides I have other, more important things to worry about like paying my bills and minding my p's and q's and having a life. So basically I am a little bit sympathetic to the idea of Christian Spanish literature but have no idea how they would do that. It's not my problem.

Sharon Deras' Favorite Song

2012-01-13T14:48:00.000-08:00

Yes, I vaguely remember Sharon Turner Deras talking about how much she loves this song she heard on the radio, a song which I had never heard of, only of the group, and how when she was dating Leonel it was her inspiration to overcome her fear of men and get married. So that's nice for her. Personally I find the song a little bit too chilling for comfort. It talks about playing games of chance and crossing swords as part of a man-woman relationship but are they married and in lover or divorcing and hate each other's guts? I can't really tell. It is better not to think too deeply about poetry and what it means or it could get really weird. Besides, I'm really not interested in examining the inner workings of Sharon Turner's head. I don't really want to know anything else about that.

Song: Amor de Hombre
Performers: Mocedades (Spain)

Mafia Connections

2012-01-12T11:57:00.000-08:00

It was actually not my mother who expressed concerns about the Hoskins' mafia connections years ago. It was Springfield that made a rule about Dave Hoskins not being involved in AG ministries because in addition to being completely immoral he is also involved with the Russian mafia, or at least that is what some people thought. I don't really know anything about that but the Hoskins sure do love to distract from their own mafia deals and I am available for that purpose, apparently.

The Hoskins Taunting

2012-01-12T08:52:00.000-08:00

I wonder sometimes why the Hoskins and their representatives Italian mafiosi are always taunting me about not having the money. Do they have nothing better to do than taunt three-year-olds? Apparently not. Do I have nothing better to do than launder the mafia's dirty money? Apparently I do. At least I can agree that these gigantic parachurch organizations are probably better equipped to handle the job of scrutizining incoming mafia dollars. Individuals like me would doubtless just be left holding the bag. Actually it was Sue who was given a handful of cash from the mafia guy who was a recent convert attending the Bible study after she sought prayer for financial needs, but I never benefited from the mafia presence. It was somewhat shocking the way what's-his-name pulled a huge wad of cash out of his pocket and peeled off a few bills to help Sue pay her rent for the month but I personally never benefited from that. He was killed a few weeks later by the mafia hit squad so he is not available to explain, unfortunately. If you are looking for the money laundering brigade you would have to ask the Hoskins because I have no clue about that stuff. All I know is that they are the fundraising machine around here, not me.

Sheldon

2012-01-11T13:58:00.000-08:00

Yes, I vaguely remember discussing with Carol Long that book, "A Severe Mercy," written by the British author Sheldon Vanauken in which he talks about his relationship with his wife, Davy, and how they met and married. They later met C.S. Lewis and under his influence came to study and accept Christianity. I do agree with Carol that there was something disturbingly weird about Sheldon's courtship and marriage to Davy. He expresses very little regret, even seems to excuse the fact that they did not wait until marriage when obviously that is not the right thing to do and real Christians who know better don't do that. It is also clear that Sheldon and his girlfriend were not Christians at the time so perhaps that is why they did not know any better and did not have any guidance of the Holy Spirit. Mr. Vanauken in his book purports to be an apologist for the Christian faith. In the sense that he is telling his story of transition or journey from being a pagan nothing to studying the Christian faith and becoming a Christian, I think that the book does have value for that kind of people who can sympathize with those who came to faith after being completely pagan in lifestyle and atheistic. Lots of people were not Christians when young and came to faith later in life so perhaps Vanauken has something to say to those kinds of people that people like me don't really need. We sort of understand his problem and enjoy his great writing style but we don't have that problem. The other weird and disturbing thing about their relationship is that they think they have to read each other's books in order to fully understand each other. That means that she had to read all the books that he had ever read in his past and vice verse. How ridiculous! It is no wonder that she died very young of cancer, because obviously reading all of his books was probably way too much to handle. I don't think it is necessary to read all your books. I have enough books rolling around in my head without adding all of your garbage, too. I just can't handle it.

Helen

2012-01-11T12:08:00.000-08:00

Sharon Turner Deras is the person who knows all about Helen who was Bobby Bueno's girlfriend for a while during college. I don't know anything about that. I never met Helen. I was already gone from the college when Helen appeared on the scene and I only remember one thing that Sharon said about her and that's all I know about that. Sharon said something about how she didn't like the way Bobby acted when he was dating Helen, as if he were a different person. Personally, I don't have much sympathy anymore for Bobby's spiteful attitude. It was nice of him to invite me to his birthday party. I only took a humorous card without a gift, I think. He said the card really got him going trying to figure it out, whatever it said, although I don't remember. I am not really one of his close friends so I felt weird being there in the first place, like he really should not have invited me there, especially if he is going to be so weird about everything. I cannot be expected to keep track of all who his people are. I just don't care that much. I have to have my own separate life. In case the Buenos forgot I am not a slave attached to their retinue and/or entourage. I have the same civil rights as everybody else on the planet. Just because I am very familiar with Helen Reddy's song, "I Am Woman," which was very popular in the early 1970s and I vaguely remember perhaps maybe hearing it on the radio station there in El Salvador, Radio La Femenina, that does not mean that I ever knew in advance or foresaw that Bobby would some day have a girlfriend named Helen. I am just not that clairvoyant. It is ridiculous the way these Bueno brats imagine that everything is all about them. They really should not be backloading everything in this weird way when actually it was just a song and it did not mean that much to me.

Margaret

2012-01-10T10:47:00.000-08:00

Oh, I had no idea these Italians were so well versed in the breeding theories of Margaret Sanger. I never read her books and never had any use for Planned Parenthood, speaking of course of the organization founded by Margaret Sanger. Just because I am white, that does not mean that I need Margaret to explain the facts of my life to me. I never had any great fondness for theories about abortion or eugenics or ever even think about that stuff very much. I would prefer to focus on normalcy and mostly ignore all of this distracting war whooping. These Italian-blacks would like to cast all white people as pro-abortionists who want to weed out Italian-blacks but actually that is not true. That is a bunch of political hoeey. Plenty of white people have not bothered to study the theories of Margaret Sanger and don't appreciate these hardball tactics. I was trying to have a life and don't really appreciate finding myself fighting against Italians on points on which we actually are in agreement. They are so subtle the way they cast me in the hotseat when actually there are also a lot of unanswered questions about their motives. However, by the time this is all sorted out it won't matter anymore. This country will probably be mostly run by Italian Catholic winers and we just won't have any choice in the matter. I don't really need to explain this. It's just a matter of time, apparently, or at least that is what they would have us believe.

Firing Dumpy Dog Elizabeth

2012-01-09T10:01:00.000-08:00

It would be sort of hard to fire Italian dumpy dog Elizabeth Iaturro, whose stupidly simpering whininess seems to permeate the South Florida landscape, because she is loaded with lots of money, her parents having left her well funded with a trust fund or something like that. I think that she may sometimes contribute her time for free to help ministries such as Angie's orphanage and possibly also contributes time and money to Jennie's whatever-it-is ministry as well as the church in Lake Worth. Yes, if only I had lots of money like Elizabeth, then I could do whatever I want and trash poor people all over the place and never have to worry about bouncing a check. Elizabeth doesn't want to get married because she thinks she was abused by her father so obviously she is not yet married that I know of. Still, Elizabeth goes to a different church now and anyway we never agreed about anything so it is pointless to try to talk to her. I remember at the 1996 reunion Elizabeth made pointed remarks about what a nice person Jennie is, as if some other people present were not so nice, perhaps myself, but I really could not care less about what stupid rich bitch Elizabeth thinks about me. I have a very low opinion of Elizabeth and her simple-minded stupid rich Italian control freak thought patterns, as for example her being impressed with Wicked Witch Jennie Cerrullo. I believe that Elizabeth might have been among those Italian girls who attended Jennie's speech at the (Leonard and Betty) Emory's house in which Jennie presented her particular opinions about love and marriage and waiting for future spouse. So that's nice but I think I was late or not aware of the right time or something so I missed that. Still, just because Elizabeth has a bank vault full of money, that does not mean that her opinion has any actual value in the bigger scheme of things. I am not interested in trying to find some orphanage to build or some queer mission theories to research just to get money from Elizabeth or to impress the many sloshed Italian winos and Hispanic-Hoskins Mcwhiner bitches that seem to live around here. They were perhaps expecting me to grovel and beg for a job there but as yet I have managed to avoid gratifying their base and vulgar plan to to cast me as the bitch in their rich man's "show." Still, my family's support alone is not going to be enough to withstand the onslaught of imposed by these trashy wicked Italians. Really, they should be ashamed of themselves. Shame on Italians!

NOT INTERESTED

2012-01-09T08:47:00.000-08:00

I am not interested in listening to the idiotic opinions of Jennie Cerrullo. Just because she is an Italian with a Ph.D. in sex, that does not mean that I need her to tell me anything. She may have her rules but she does not rule me in any way. She is just another whiny Italian bitch who has not yet realized that it's not all about her. I know her from college so I know what she is. Someone was telling me that Jennie spent a year or more in Hong Kong as a principal of a school there in the 1980s and for some bizarre reason it was thought that I am supposed to be impressed by this and think of Jennie as my representative to China. That's ridiculous and of course Jennie will not get the job. I have no reason to hire anyone to represent me in China, for one thing. I have no reason to want to reconnect to the Christians or the church in Hong Kong which is not exactly where they were stationed part of the time anyway. Never would I ever have reason to contact the descendants of the first Chinese converts of my great-grandparents when they were there in the 1910s and 1920s. For one thing it would be impossible even if I were to try. And also, it is thought that some of these early converts strayed into Mormonism or other cults which is sad but I can't help them now. I would not want the Chinese Christians there exposed to certain idiot relatives or to imagine that the descendants of my great-grandparents are anything like them now in terms of Christian values. One hundred years after the fact most of my relatives, with a few exceptions, do not remember the Azusa Street era or know anything about it. They are just typical California heathens now.

Strange Theories

2012-01-09T07:55:00.000-08:00

Yes, one might reasonably wonder if Mrs. Studdert's shocking public revelation from her single days as a missionary in China would have any negative repercussions in her later adult married life after returning to her native Britain. One might also imagine that meddlesome voyeurs might appropriate the letter and twist it and use it to serve other purposes not originally intended by Mrs. Studdert, not that I would know anything about that. Nevertheless, she seems to have married as planned and had three sons as listed in the online peerage so perhaps she was a wealthy person. Nevertheless, this letter is of not much use to me as this is not among my research interests. I might have read articles about this in Sunday School literature or Christian magazines or somewhere. Also, I am not unaware that there are some professional academics who devote much of their time to developing queer theories about the possible secret sex sins of Christian missionaries working in China in days of old. However, I personally am not interested in pursuing this line of thought or in having any book or term paper written on this subject with my name on it. They must have me confused with someone else. All I can say is that although there might have been such anomalous cases in the field unbeknownst to the majority, still these are dysfunctional cases and not representative of the majority of missionaries in the field whether single or married. I am personally not interested in focusing on these dysfunctional cases that serve only as distractions to the central truth of the gospel and the actual purpose of the Christian mission to China which is mainly to preach the gospel and to build up a local church where none previously existed.

Sin and the Legal Presciption

2012-01-08T18:49:00.000-08:00

Here is an interesting page here about secret sins that are difficult for me to discuss in a public setting, although I do remember reading the similar article on a similar or the same subject in Assemblies of God Sunday School literature that was sent to us free on the field. As we can see here, interestingly, these secret sins afflicted even missionaries in China more than 100 years ago:

Testimony of a Young Lady Missionary (c. 1900)

However, most people probably would rather not talk about these things publicly because the possibility of public shame and ridicule could be worse than the cure. I am like most people, preferring to discuss any personal matters with God personally and individually rather than in some collective and public argument.

Gloating

2012-01-08T17:12:00.000-08:00

Yes, I vaguely remember discussing with someone about how dangerous it is to give any appearance of being happy about and gloating at someone else's distress. Maybe someday God will notice everyone's gleeful abandon at observing my sorrows and give everyone a taste of me or some reasonable facsimile instead of the other way around, always punishing my for everyone else's misfortune.

Affirmative Action

2012-01-08T16:47:00.000-08:00

Yes, it's very easy for these Italians to set themselves up as the über-race of the next generation, bearers of the genetic markers of "Aryan" superiority and supremacy, when all of the affirmative action is flowing their way and nothing the other way. Did they not learn anything from World War II? Affirmative action is a program that can handicap the race for outsiders. Yes, we talked about affirmative action in that principles of law class taught by Herb Titus. Titus was later dumped for reasons unknown to me. I am not really sure what I think about that, but still I do tend to think that affirmative action does not do any favors to plain-vanilla white people of middle to lower class of no extraordinary achievement, just mostly average and trying to find a place yet required to pay full price or nothing. Perhaps nothing is better than trying to win a race I can't win anyway. If I do nothing and don't even try then I can't lose and thus will not be disappointed and humiliated later. That approach sounds sort of depressing but nevertheless it does make a lot of sense. Nothing wins.

Counselors

2012-01-07T09:42:00.000-08:00

I don't need any counselors, especially NOT Jennie Cerullo. Even though she now has a Ph.D. in sex and an important ministry, I remember her from college as a whiny, screechy Italian "cheerleader" that nobody really liked very much. She is proof that winning the Teen Challenge talent show does not necessarily mean you are going to have a big-time music ministry. Jennie has her money and her big-time ministry so she doesn't need anything from me. There is no way that I can be required to kiss her putrid Italian butt. After all, she is not my mother-in-law so I don't have to.

Bill Bill Bill

2012-01-06T18:26:00.000-08:00

Why all this focus on insignficant, uninteresting, utterly boring Bill? If I had lots of money I would never have to see bill's paper face starting back at me ever again. If only I could banish bills' memory forever from the planet. I am doing my best to ignore bill but obviously, like everyone on the planet, I will have to pay the bills eventually. I just wish I could pay the bill off now rather than later, if only I had the foggiest clue how to do that, but anyway, there is always hope that with time the bills will disappear. Hope and Bill go together nicely, a real match for Colorado. As long as I have hope I can continue to imagine that the bills will be banished eventually to oblivion so that is.

Hanging Up

2012-01-06T09:01:00.000-08:00

Ok, maybe I did answer the phone a few times in Virginia and there was only the heavy breathing guy on the other end of the line. However, I don't remember having any extended conversation with him other than "hello... hello... hello." That was pretty much all there is was to say to someone who just isn't tuned in to reality. I might have had some of these calls elsewhere in the past also. I remember that once in Cooper City, Florida, a guy called and said he was doing market research and asked if I had a few minutes to answer some questions. I answered a one or two questions that seemed innocuous, then answered a very uncomfortably personal question, and then the next question after that was so bizarre that I hung up the phone. Since then, I have not had much time for these people who call on the phone. Like I usually say to salespeople, send me something in the mail. That way I can see what it is and throw it away forthwith, deposited directly into the garbage can. If you call me on the phone I don't know who you are and I can't trust you.

Dirty Phone Calls

2012-01-05T16:45:00.000-08:00

I vaguely remember that one of my roommates, either the one from North Carolina or else Joyce, commented about the dirty phone calls with heavy breathing that were coming in every day early in the morning. The primary phone line was in her bedroom so she always picked up the phone first, the other phone being in the kitchen. She said there was some heavy breathing, mostly, and weirdness. She at first accused me of doing something to invite all of these dirty callers but no I did nothing. The previous roommate for the first year there, the counseling major, had always answered the phone so I really was not aware of those counseling sessions. Something was said about our phone number being posted in the men's bathroom at Norfolk University but like I said at the time I cannot imagine how that could happen. I don't recall even using the women's bathroom maybe a couple of times I went along invited by some people, including Machelle Bush, to use the library over there to research term papers. I am not sure why they were so fascinated with Norfolk when CBN's library was quite well equipped by that time. I think maybe we had our phone number changed or something like that so that seemed to solve the problem although I really don't remember very much about that.

North Carolina

2012-01-04T16:28:00.000-08:00

I don't remember the name of the roommate from North Carolina. After the roommate from Florida moved out, that is to say, the psychology major with the black boyfriend from Pompano Beach, I found a roommate from North Carolina. She was there for a few months and then she moved out and said she would not be paying rent for the month of November and could and would not say, nay, even I daresay refused to say for sure whether she would be returning to room with me again or not and in fact left a distinct impression that she might have other plans in the works. Being in that state of uncertainty in which I found myself, I at about that time met Joyce at church. Joyce told me that she felt that God had told her that I would be her roommate and could she please be my roommate until the time that she was scheduled to get married. I said OK since I really did not have any other firm plans and needed someone to be paying the other half of the rent. Some time later, I think more than a month, the other former roommate returned from North Carolina and confronted not me but Joyce, demanding that Joyce give her her room back. Joyce told me this and I said not to worry. I had not promised anything to the roommate from North Carolina. She was the one who left without paying rent and in a precarious financial state so I was under no obligation to her. With all of her North Carolina connections I am sure she had no problem finding some other place to live.

The Boys

2012-01-04T13:07:00.000-08:00

That was sort of strange that Sylvia was living in the Buenos' house with a bunch of guys. I would never think of living that way. What a nightmare that would have been! There might have been a joke about that in college because in the classroom we can't help but overhear every mundane or humorous detail of Terry's strange life with the guys, sort of, so we almost feel like we live there but not really, just a joke. Really, life is complicated enough without compounding the confusion by living with a bunch of MK guys who can never keep their facts straight and can't really stand to have a girl tell them anything, as if girls don't have anything intelligent to say. Ha! Maybe they will grow up someday but it won't be my problem. I will never find the fountain of youth in Florida so I will just grow old along with everybody else, obviously. There is nothing magical about the sandy state. It's just a very big sandbar, nothing more.

Anyway, the main reason why it might have seemed weird is that there is the appearance of evil if a girl lives in a house with a bunch of guys who are not related to her. Danuta got fired after her book revealed she had longtime boyfriend who was black, so if he had been white would her career have survived? No, probably not because it was not the color that was the problem in this situation. I vaguely remember the roommate from North Carolina saying something about Danuta and her book which I picked up somewhere cheap at a used bookstore. I must have gotten rid of that book becuase I don't seem to have it anymore. Still, if I ever wrote an autobiography it would be nothing like Danuta's. Of that you can be sure.

2012-01-04T09:04:00.000-08:00

Isaiah 5:20: "Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter."

Romans 14:16: "Let not then your good be evil spoken of."

Ok, so years ago when I was living in California I remember talking to Sylvia Brooke and I remember her talking about how shocked she was when she came to the United States after living most of her life in Costa Rica and heard people using that colloquial expression, "Bad!" in reference to something good, in substitution for words like "Wow!" and "Cool!" That is so unbiblical and wrong to call something good bad or something bad good. I do agree with Sylvia on that point although I am not sure what to do about that. It happens all the time in English and also in Spanish, actually, in case she forgot or never studied Salvadoran literature perhaps, like for example that drama we were assigned, "Black Light," in which two disembodied heads carry on about whatever, as if there were something illuminating about consulting the dead. Wrong! This is a sin sick planet in which we live. On that point I do agree with Sylvia.

Working Days

2012-01-03T09:11:00.000-08:00

I vaguely remember discussing with my mother the fact that we sort of feel guilty about not doing very much in terms of direct evangelism and Sunday School work when we were in El Salvador. When compared to some other missionary families in other countries, we did not do very much nor were we asked or expected to do anything. In contrast, in Costa Rica Sylvia Brooke and her mother Hope were known to be very active in planning Sunday School activities. In El Salvador I personally was not asked to do very much of anything and I did not initiate anything either. The local work was much more developed in El Salvador and there was not really any need of MKs to tell those people anything. They think they can do everything all by themselves and don't need any know-it-all America missionary kids to tell them anything so there was no reason for me to intrude into places where I was not welcome. Costa Rica, on the other hand, is a country with very few churches, much less developed, a place where the local people were content to let the missionaries pretty much run the show so there was a very different thing going on down there. I can't really imagine doing that in El Salvador. It just wouldn't be necessary.

Triplett Triteness

2012-01-02T11:15:00.000-08:00

I am also trying to understand why I should care about the Tripletts? What have the Tripletts ever done for me other than make my life miserable in a very literalistic and legalistic sense? Nicaragua is far away and has nothing of interest to teach me about anything. I know all I need to know about Spanish culture and history without any help from Don, Mark, and Tim, thank you very much. I know everything I need to know about China without any help from Mark's wife Jeanette, who was an MK somewhere in Asia although I don't remember exactly which country. Ok, so I'll just say that I am not unaware and may have overheard somewhere that some people are very disturbed by the Tripletts' manorial obsessions and castle crazes of the feudal variety. They imagine themselves the lords of the manor commissioned for the purpose of beating pitiful serfs, in which class they have imagined myself included, into a state of cowering submission. All of that sour grapes about rules and regulations imposed by the bigwigs up there, do they really imagine that was all just an imaginary script? That the benevolent lords-a-leaping ever cared for a second about the hours of inconvenience, all the blood, sweat, and tears they imposed on the workers in the fields? No, they don't really care about us in any kind of personal way. It's just a business, after all, an international exchange of lifestyle commodities. Our ideas and thoughts will not even be considered. No, the ideas that matter come from themselves and benefit mainly themselves. So what if the middle gets squeezed out? It just doesn't matter in a feudal society. In a feudal society the Tripletts are sequestered in their baronial estate while the hoi polloi cough and wheeze and succumb to the pestiferous plague. So, like, why should I care about castles? If I had the money to travel, there is no shortage of ruined castles in Europe waiting to be photographed. But it's not really about them. So I'm just saying.

Blue Angels

2012-01-02T09:27:00.000-08:00

Oops! Correction. I never saw any U.S. military personnel "boots on the ground" during high school but I do remember the Blue Angels flying overhead, piloted no doubt by U.S. military personnel of some sort, probably Air Force I would imagine although the other branches also have aircraft so actually I am not so sure. I really don't remember much about that.

Joseph

2012-01-01T16:28:00.000-08:00

Oh, did I ever mention that I never know of the existence of General Joseph Stilwell until very recently? I must admit that I was never a student of the politics and history of China and never had a clue about who all those military people were in World War II nor did ever have much interest. It is not like Chinese culture ever interested me in the slightest with all their shrieky weird fingernails-on-a-blackboard music and strangeness. I only know that my great-grandparents were there for a while but not as military people. If their missionary experience was anything like ours, they probably never saw a U.S. military person their entire time overseas and never thought about that very much. There is not much connection between missionary and military. We might sing that song, "Onward Christian Soldiers," but the only purpose that mattered to us was the Great Commission. Military is a whole different matter and not something with which we should concern ourselves, as the military so often is fond of reminding us.

Marine Corp

2012-01-01T09:29:00.000-08:00

Yes, that's so nice that Uncle Art served in the Marines some time back in the 1950s. It is so nice that the U.S. government takes care of the veterans who served in the armed services and who were willing to risk life and limb to protect the nation. The U.S. government gives them educational funding and medical care and all kinds of other benefits too numerous to mention. Yes, that is so nice although Uncle Art never served in China, a war that was never resolved in the most ideal way as far as America was concerned but at least we had Taiwan and its little toehold on China. Don't you know that "Semper fidelis" (Always Faithful) applies only to U.S. Marines in case we forgot? The Marines are faithful to themselves and to the U.S. in a general and collective sense but they have their own families to take care of and we cannot expect the Marines to be faithful to us or to care about what happens to us in the future in any kind of personal way. We cannot be expected to keep track of the U.S. Marines when we almost never see them and almost never hear from them anyway. Those military people watch out for each other and that's nice for them. It is nice to know that the U.S. Marines are there to do whatever they do but we cannot expect them to ever do us any favors or to ever say anything good about us because obviously they don't really care in any kind of personal way. Sometimes we have to find our own way in life because obviously they just don't care.

Games

2011-12-31T07:53:00.000-08:00

I wonder when these people will get a clue that I am really not interested in playing their silly Bering Strait game. I am just sitting here trying to have a life and they are standing around me with daggers poised waiting for a chance to slaughter me because I have better English spelling skills than they do. I think this game is rigged from the get-go and I am not going to be playing by their rules, thanks anyway. I would rather commit suicide than cave in to this contrived reality. You should know, however, that if you do play by their rules that their rules will become everybody's rules and that reality will be changed, eventually. Perish the thought. I would rather just not have a life if I have to play the Bering Strait game. It is legal to play in self-defense but when I am greatly outnumbered the odds are against me.

Quiet

2011-12-29T06:54:00.000-08:00

I am a quiet person and it is better this way. I vaguely remember in college Cori and maybe others complaining about me never talking very much. I might have said that I don't usually talk very much when I don't know people very well and don't trust them. Even now I see no reason to talk very much. There never was any reason for me to trust Cori with any personal information, now less more so than ever. I don't remember what I was thinking.

Candyland Game

2011-12-28T19:18:00.000-08:00

I don't think that we ever actually owned this game, Candyland, and I only vaguely remember playing it when visiting other people's houses and playing with other people's children. I don't think I need this game in my house. The spelling would really bug me, for one thing. It would only perpetuate the confused notion of these naughty children who imagine the name Candy has something to do with me when obviously my name ends with an "i" and not a "y." And besides, it would perpetuate my sister's misperception that success in life means beating on me at every opportunity and taking every chance to humiliate me in the eyes of everyone who I formerly imagined might be my friends. I am tired of fighting about this but just copping this Mom act and reminding me to clean the bathroom is not going to gain you any peer respect from me. I know better. This is all just another game to humiliate me and so it doesn't really have very much to do with the reality that God loves me and has a plan for my life, a plan for good and not for evil, that is if the Bible can be believed and applied to me just the same as everybody else on the planet.

Misery

2011-12-28T15:52:00.000-08:00

There is no forgiveness for three-year-olds like me and so it would be pointless for me to try to do anything more. Of one thing I can be sure, that all my relationships will be taken from me, that all my achievements will be taken from me, that anything good will be taken from me and I will be given only bad, so obviously prayer is pointless. Why should I give the putridly wicked enemy Hoskins anymore presents? God hates me, obviously, so no remedy is available to thrust stupid swine Rob into a bottomless pit. Besides, they needed a substitute Mao to bash and I was available to represent my generation in a life of misery inflicted by the U.S. Army for whatever mysterious reason. That was so mean and nasty what they did to Mao, I have to agree. However, it is not supposed to be my problem. Does Mao really think that she alone of all women on the planet was cast aside with utter contempt and disdain to make room for the U.S.-favored Madame Chiang Chai-Shek? Hardly. It happens all the time but it becomes just so much more political when these generals and captains are poking their noses in places where they don't belong.

The Facts Of Life

2011-12-25T19:46:00.000-08:00

My mother explained to me the facts of life when I was about 11 years old. She gave a very thorough and excellent explanation and also gave me a small book, "Almost Eleven," which includes all the essential information helpful for an 11-year-old, including pictures of the component parts necessary for human reproduction. Thus I have no further need of any other mother to explain the facts of life to me. I am assuming that all mothers give the same valuable instructions to all of their daughters and there is no need for me to explain the facts of life to anyone else on the planet in the future, certainly not my own sister, only my own daughter should I ever have one. I cannot imagine why anyone would think otherwise. Obviously, literature class has absolutely nothing to do with it. As far as I am concerned, the books assigned to us in literature class are mostly written by tortured individuals who have a lot of problems that I cannot possibly imagine and mostly would profer not to try to imagine. Literature reflects the sinful condition of people who mess up very badly and I do feel sorry for them but that is not my problem. My mother did mention on a later occasion about having read Nathaniel Hawthorne's "The Scarlet Letter" which is obviously the big "A" but that conversation was not in connection with or by way of explaining the facts of life. That was a whole different conversation at a later and different time about the problem of literature and how sometimes we have to read these books for homework assignments even if they are very unpleasant or boring or weird because they do say something about reality or the culture in which we happen to live and must function, not because we would want to take those people home with us and live in their sick realities and absorb their warped and twisted worldviews as our own. I can say pretty much the same about all books and magazines. My knowledge of these matters might have expanded through the years in terms of reading but still there is no reentry law requiring me to explain the birds and the bees in order to resume my duties as a citizen of the United States upon returning from Latin America. There is no reason, no law on earth, requiring me to discuss these very personal matters with the Pentagon. What would those stupid stuffed-shirt bigwigs know about girl stuff? Nothing obviously. To this day, I fail to understand Cori's fascination with asking stupid questions about these subject matters. Why should I care about whatever Cori said about her mother? I really don't care. I don't even remember those people and Cori was never my boss except in her own sick and twisted mind. There is no need for me to prove anything to anyone about what I think about these matters and no reason for me to accept a slave position in regards to Cori. I can't have these trashy rich bitches getting accustomed to thinking of themselves as my boss or master. How ridiculous. It is necessary for poor girls like me to tell rich bitches like Cori what I will do and what I will not do and that's just the way it is. Cori has no power to fire me or to tell me anything else. I don't need her garbage. If I want to quit and I can certainly quit any time I want to. There is no law requiring me to do Mrs. Nipper's dirty work. And anyway, it's not a matter of being right in terms of intellect and understanding. It is about finding the Mr. Right but if he never made an appearance in my life there is just nothing else I can do about it. Statistically there are just not enough men to go around, too many single women left over who just are never going to make it to the altar through no fault of their own. That is just a fact of life. There is no reason to self-flagellate and beat myself up because the odds are against me. Yes, if I only I had attended the Foursquare even church I might have perhaps had a slim chance of sighting Lisa Welchel from the TV show, "The Facts of Life." But as it is, the odds are against me.

Beall

2011-12-24T08:23:00.000-08:00

In her diaries, my great-grandmother often speaks of her friend Anna Beall from Pasadena, Calif. Anna and her husband, Granville 'Grant' Edsell Beall, seem to have moved to California from Ohio at about the same time that my great-grandparents did, perhaps even earlier. However, according to military records it appears that in 1898 Mr. "Grant" Beall was a 21-year-old private fighting in the Spanish-American War. A quick Google shows that Mr. "Grant" Beall was actually white, not black, and he was also not the only Beall soldier fighting in that war. Beyond that I really can't say much about that. I have not studied the Spanish-American War very much and am only vaguely aware of it. It seems that Grant Beall, originally from Greene County in Ohio, also spent some time in Tahiti in the 1920s, according to ship passenger records of him having sailed at least twice to and from Tahiti and San Francisco. What was Grant doing in Tahiti? The answer is not clear. I have no other clue so don't ask me. And why was Grant Beall admitted to a mental hospital in 1926, at age 50, with a diagnosis of manic depressive and psychosis? I just have no clue about that either. He died in 1944 at age 68 so obviously we never met. I never knew this person existed and anyway he is not even related to us, just the husband of a friend of my great-grandparents, so I can't say much about it. There is no real connection there. We have no idea what happened to their daughter Miriam and her family after they moved to Northern California. Life is too short to keep track of all these people.

Literature

2011-12-23T02:04:00.000-08:00

Literature does not tell us how to survive. Literature only tells us about the hopelessly sinful human condition and often what not to do. From high school's "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" we learn that your decision to flout the rules of Nurse Ratched at the mental hospital could result in your lobotomization. They will literally have your brain disabled so that you really won't know what happened to you or even care anymore. That's the problem with insane asylums. The people are just drugged all the time so barely functional and there is no privacy, no way to avoid rubbing elbows with the inmates. There is no real "asylum" for the insane, an oxymoron of terminology. Tht is what happens if you do not play by the rules, a scary prospect indeed. And from "To Kill A Mockingbird" we learn that the Deep South is a very weird place to be and not my choice of permanent residence. I was never one of those tortured people and hopefully will never have to go there.

Canadian Farewell

2011-12-22T16:22:00.000-08:00

It really is annoying that this Canadian, lewd crude Madame Crawley, has parked herself nearby pretending to be someone of importance when actually she was only a friend of Pam from Michigan. She was always rude to me and I always sensed that she was trashing me behind my back all the time. So why should I care about her opinion? I couldn't care less. She is one of the most boring people. She knows nothing about anything other than her own nursing career so there is no intelligent conversation to be had with those people from the hospital. Hopefully I will never need them. I shouldn't have to explain this. I shouldn't have to verbally express my extremely low opinion of them and risk endangering myself, but these Canadians never seem to get a clue about when to back off so finally I have to tell them to shut their big fat mouths. They never seem to realize that it's not all about them. Someone really should get a message to them in Canada while there still is a North America not yet wiped off the map.

Art vs. Faith

2011-12-22T10:51:00.000-08:00

I vaguely remember that interesting short story from Salvadoran fiction in which a thief and murderer and lapsed priest in Guatemala of the 1500s is crucified. I might have read/translated part of this story for Barbara Miller of Mississippi although I really don't remember. During Uraco's long criminal career he had come to think of himself as a noble creature, one who committed bad deeds in order to spare "good people." He murdered his friend so that his friend would not have to carry out orders to act as executioner. Uraco took upon himself the bad in order to spare the good and after he was captured the judges decided to reward Uraco's "generosity" with his own execution by crucifixion. It so happened that while Uraco's body was hanging on a cross on a Central American hillside that a professional artist who had been commissioned by the Catholic church to make an artistic rendering of Christ's crucifixion was walking nearby with his notebook in hand and saw Uraco's dead body. Immediately he sprang into action, sketching a vision of Uraco that would serve as the model for his artwork, a sculpture known as the "Black Christ." It so happens that there really is a famous sculpture named the "Black Christ of Esquipulas" located in a Catholic church in the Guatemalan town of Esquipulas which is just across the border from Guatemala but the verifiable facts pretty much end there. It is said that the wood from which the 400-year-old sculpture was carved has turned dark as it has aged over the years, thus matching the skin color of the original inhabitants of the region when it was conquered by the Spanish. The story is an interesting and well written contrivance of human imagination, an entertaining blend of fact and fiction. In truth, art is beautiful and fascinating in its place but in and of itself it has no redemptive value. Art for art's sake is a dead end. Uraco, if he ever did exist outside of the author's imagination, was just another sinner who died. Praying to his image will not save anyone. The artist also was just a man carrying out the orders of the religious clerics who rewarded his talent according to the local market value. The artist was just another sinner who died. The church of Esquipulas was built on a site at which it is said that a local inhabitant had a vision of Christ crucified. The local inhabitants were just people who died as are we all. It was only Jesus who rose from the dead and who holds the keys to sin and death and is at the right hand of the throne of God making intercession for us. So sometimes all this art is just a distraction. So I found the story of the "Black Christ" very interesting in its own artsy way and yet it is wrong in a sense. There is no glory in being bad and sacrificing a good and clear conscience in order to meet the demands of art. Or maybe that was the author's point, sort of. Christ died so that we would not have to do that.

Not Impressed

2011-12-21T14:13:00.000-08:00

Yes, it's true. I never much liked or had any desire to talk to or be friends with Canada's "Madame" Crawley. She always was much too busy servicing all the men that flocked to flop and spend the night at her high-rise apartment near the beach, especially those dippity dumb MK guys Warren (MK-Uruguay) and Tim (MK-Nicaragua). Why does she even pretend to be a Christian and attend church when she obviously has no brains in her sick Canadian snowbrain head? I have heard what people said about her behind her back, and also the things that people say about stupid Canadians who flock to South Florida and never have a clue about how rude they are and how nobody really likes them and wishes they would get a clue and go back to Canada, and I can't say that they were wrong. Just because she got married later to a U.S. guy who lives at the airport, that doesn't mean that her opinion is worth two cents, at least in my humble opinion.

Bottled

2011-12-20T06:35:00.000-08:00

During my second semester at Evangel, my roommate in Spence Third North was Jan Green. She was a wild and worldly redhead except that her red hair actually came out of a bottle so she really does not represent redheads in any real way and is not an example of redheads. She proves that lots of wild and worldly women are actually not redheads and so there is no direct correlation.

The Problem With Canadians

2011-12-19T05:14:00.000-08:00

The problem with Canadians is they come down here and impose on us their alternate reality, as if their opinions ever mattered to us in the formation of our country. Ha! We cannot have these stupid socialist Canadians running our country. We are independent of Canada in case the wicked Canadians forgot. We need to remind these Wicked Canadians more often that they really have no choice in the matter of what I do with my life or where I go. If I choose not to discuss my personal business with Canada's demon trash Ann Campbell, that is no big deal. We are not impressed with these stupid socialist Canadians who come down here and pretend to be part of the elite rocket scientist immigrants who were brought in here to show us how to run our lives. That's ridiculous. There are plenty of U.S. well trained nurses to fill the hospital staff when the Canadians go back to Canada where they belong, in case they forgot. If Canada is such a great place to live and if Canadians are so smart, then I really think the Canadians should just stay in Canada or go back to their idealic country because we would be just fine without them and their alternate reality, thanks anyway.

Known By The Company You Keep

2011-12-18T14:01:00.000-08:00

We see those poor empty-headed boys Thomas and Raymond thinking that the only word in the English dictionary starts with a big F. Wrong! There are so many other words in the English language so rich in meaning and depth and clarity of understanding. How sad that those two guys have been spending way too much time hanging out with foul-mouthed Canadian demon-witch Ann Campbell. Obviously. It is so easy for the incredibly wicked nasty Canadian Ann Campbell to buy friends. She is so very rich and has so much money that obviously everyone takes everything that Ann Campbell says way too seriously. Ann Campbell is one of the dumbest people I ever knew. She is a classic example of spoiled rotten rich kid, one whose opinion is given way too much importance given the lack of content contained in her empty head. It is not like I ever had a chance to tell dippity dumb Ann anything. She was always trained from the beginning to hate my guts because I never did have the money that Susie did nor the Stewart connections, nor did I ever try to pretend such but try to explain that to these little spoiled rich brats who sit around gossiping and collaborating on their fictional works behind my back. Besides, I never did have patience to fawn all over these pompous little rich kids the way that the Stewarts did. Down there, it is easy for these Scottish pretenders to use their vast wealth to buy friends and followers but that is just not my thing. That was never my modus operandi, my reason for being. Obviously, those people seem to think that all missionaries are pretenders to royalty but actually it is only the Stewarts and the Campbells that I know of who ever did that. The rest of us just suffer by comparison because it is just part of the company that we have to keep. I am not really one of them but it is hard to explain this.

Tom

2011-12-17T08:01:00.000-08:00

I have no idea what Tom's problem is. I just don't remember much of anything about Tom. His oral book reports in class always put me into a deep sleep. I always thought he was such a boring guy with nothing of interest to say. I cannot remember a single thing that Tom ever said except for the time that I was stuck in a small group and he and Raymond were saying mostly F— F— F—. It is sad that those two guys were not born with brains so they have nothing intelligent to say. They have no vocabulary, obviously, or they would be able to articulate their deep and abiding hatred for me which knows no bounds. Whatever that means. I just couldn't care less about Tom and his empty mind so all this hubbub about Tom means nothing to me. It's just ridiculous.

Stuart Pretenders

2011-12-15T14:41:00.000-08:00

Oh yes, I forgot. There is yet another pretender to the Stuart throne of Scotland, a Polish count or something like that. Perhaps he is some sort of cousin or kin to the Smeyas and that is why we have this Polish shrew screaming in that background about her son Roy who as we all have heard spends a lot of time checking in and out of depressionville. How bizarre! And how were we to know that all of these people we thought were simply our friends and co-workers and classmates were actually pretenders? That they had so-called Stuart monarchy connections? We had no idea. I know I certainly never gave it a thought. It is so weird how these Stuart pretenders pretend to be better than me even when they just have a lot more money to throw around because of their royal connections to elaborate their pretentions upon which they hope to build a global throneroom or something like that. We have no preference for any of these Stuart pretenders. Don't these people realize that we do not have any monarchs here in America? I do not think that we even have any Chinese monarch in our connections either. How common are these royal Chinese surnames anyway? This is all just so ridiculous. It's cruel to put me at the crux of this blob of nothingness.

Clock

2011-12-15T06:08:00.000-08:00

I never opened my Christmas presents before time, but I do remember one Christmas that my parents put a certain box under tree. The box was still ticking when they put it under the tree so obviously it was a clock, even though it wound down later. No surprise there.

What is Faith?

2011-12-13T17:48:00.000-08:00

According to the Bible, faith is "being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."
And yet there is no evidence that I have anything to hope for. I never get what I want. I feel ridiculous if I even try to pray because it is just ridiculous thinking that I have any hope of anything. Don't I know that I have been cursed by all kinds of important, rich, powerful people and condemned to a life of uselessness for some mysterious reason? It's almost like those stupid rich people think that I am a snake that should be crawling around on its belly for the rest of its life. How utterly absurd and ridiculous! It is no wonder that that the sacred cows are now locked away in an insane asylum so that their drugged out hallucinations do not spill over onto the rest of the population. What did I do to deserve this horrible curse of being treated like a crawling snake? I just cannot imagine. And how could anything good ever come of anything that I ever think of doing, especially with all of these wicked rich people leering down at me from their lofty perches, because I am under this curse and tripping me every time I turn around? God must really hate me to treat me in this horrible way. That's all I can say about that. By their logic, then, the Bible is just a bunch of gibberish and all of His promises are false and church is a farcical exercise in futility. I don't really believe that but I am just repeating whatever they say, obviously, because, after all, I am a copycat and I reflect whatever they want. It's not like I have any choice in the matter. I reflect snakes because they are snakes. That's all.

Fasting

2011-12-13T16:23:00.000-08:00

Yes, I am well aware of the biblical prescription and instructions on fasting. I vaguely remember talking to Mark Brown in the lunchroom and he was making all kinds of snide remarks about Lee Bueno's book on fasting and how fasting is supposed to be a secret and so basically it would be sort of annoying to have to promote Lee's book. One would come off sounding so pretentious and phony and hypocritical, sort of like those drugged out dogs of Northern California. I sort of agree with Mark in a way although Mark is too extreme. Mark thinks that it is wrong to have any book on fasting ever written or published. I think Mark is an off-the-wall Baptist extremist. I think there is a place for books on fasting in the Christian book marketplace. I imagine there are probably hundreds of books about fasting available if one wants to look for one and buy one. I personally would not buy Lee's book mainly for personal reasons, because in my experience it is well proven that she is one of the nastiest meanest people on the planet and I am not going to give that Wicked Witch a place to tell me anything and run my life into the ground promoting her own family's vast wealth at my expense, not because there is necessarily anything wrong with fasting or reading or writing a book about fasting. So I disagree with Mark on many points. So that's my opinion, not that I would ever dare to say what I really think about those people in public. It would be too risky and dangerous. Lee would have my chopped head on platter, that's how mean and nasty she is, obviously.

British Petroleum

2011-12-13T10:08:00.000-08:00

All of which begs the question: Why does BP hate us so much? Since when does BP care about Texas oil? Don't they have enough oil sources all over the world? Why make this such a personal vendetta? Is it because my grandfather happened to be Scottish? Like, why should that matter? Are there no other oil companies out there investigating the validity of mineral rights claims in the United States? Certainly the land is the territory of neither Spain nor Britain, and no Spanish or British claims would be upheld in a court of law, obviously, so I don't see why all of this should escalate into an international incident. Obviously the owners should be U.S. citizens and that is all that should matter to them. The Baptists never did anything to deserve it any more than anyone else, obviously, and do not have even a shred of legal standing in this regard so there is no reason to consult their selfish and greedy opinions. Certainly, the extraction of oil would not make us all that rich anyway. Assuming that drilling ever did occur, which has not happened in all these many years, and assuming there actually were oil down there, even though they often would have us believe there is nothing there, we would only get a small percentage of which ten percent would be tithed to the church but not necessarily the Baptists and anyway I probably would not even have a chance to decide that because I will be dead and gone long before anything could ever happen, having been murdered by everyone I ever trusted, because it just takes too long and I am not immortal and who knows, the longer this is delayed the more the Baptists will take every opportunity to grandstand and finagle even if it doesn't belong to them and it's really none of their business. And who is that horrible lady who owns some of the land nearby but has nothing of ours so it is none of her business? With their meddling way the Baptists will be ruining it for everyone else, and especially for me. I am not immortal and there is no reason to count my chickens before they hatch so I am just a sitting duck, a dead sitting duck. There is no reason to assume that I would ever derive any benefit from something that does not belong to me anyway so this is just an exercise in futility.

Speaking of Christmas

2011-12-11T10:03:00.000-08:00

Speaking of Christmas, I vaguely remember that during my first newspaper job in Central Florida, while I was assigned to cover the goings on at Dundee Town Hall, the mayor and city council at the time made a big fuss about Christmas. Every year they placed a creche or nativity scene on public land near the town hall. This particular year they received a letter from the ACLU requesting the removal of the creche from public land. The mayor of the city made a big dramatic statement about that in her remarks from the podium. So I dutifully reported this incident in the bi-weekly newspaper. The reporter for the competing newspaper also reported the story in the larger daily newspaper. Her story was more spun in favor of the ACLU and basically ignored the city's reaction whereas my story was more reported in terms of reporting the mayor's comments about the city's determination to continue defying the ACLU. That was in about 1989 or 1990. I have not been back to Dundee since being reassigned out of Dundee so cannot comment on subsequent city councils or whether they still have a creche there on public land or not. It could get very expensive for the city if the ACLU decides to take the battle over Christmas to the courts so I think it is very reasonable for them not to have a creche simply for that reason. No one is paying my salary so there is no reason for me to say anything else about that. There is only a story if people talk. Talk is cheap, certainly, no matter what angle you take. As for my personal Christmas and what Christmas decor may or may not exist in my house, it's just none of your business. I wouldn't want the ACLU showing up at my doorstep, you see, so I will just keep it to myself, thanks anyway.

Speaking of Books

2011-12-11T09:44:00.000-08:00

Yes, I vaguely remember that Miriam Denham, Bob Hoskins' joke-cracking and shorthand whiz secretary and Susie's erstwhile roommate, mentioning that she wants to write a book. And who wouldn't want to write a book? I also might have mentioned that idea to other listening posts at some time in my life. Every day thousands of books are published by thousands of authors so this is nothing unusual. Lee Bueno might like to imagine herself the only creditable book author in Christendom, and that with only one published title to her name, and yet hundreds of other Christians also have many books published and write books of many kinds all the time so it is not really such an unusual thing to want to write a book. I fail to see why it should matter that someone says that. It is a long way from saying that to actually getting a book published, certainly, but anyway talk is cheap.

Speaking of Susan

2011-12-11T09:36:00.000-08:00

I fail to see why I should rearrange my entire life to make room for the nothingness of fat ugly Susan. Just because her last name is really Stewart, that does not mean that she is closely related to the Stuarts, especially not Jon Stuart, or that she is really an heir to the throne of Scotland or England. Ha ha ha! Do not make me laugh. This is too stupid for jokes. Some pathetically ignorant peons of Latin America may be inordinately impressed with persons by the last name of Stuart/Stewart for that very reason, because of the lingering legends of ancient Scottish history, but that does not justify capitalizing on the misunderstanding and confusion of them by setting oneself up as some sort of aristocrat of royal ancestry in their eyes when actually one's ancestors were just regular folks, farmers and ranchers or something like that. The actual recognized descendants of the Stuart monarchy now live in Spain, as we read in the celebrity gossip mags. They mostly speak Spanish probably and have no kingdom or Scottish subjects to justify any claim to political power even if they may have a lot of money and influential friends. The Stuarts were never elected president of Scotland and it is doubtful that anyone living would want to return to the days of absolute monarchy when the people just didn't have any choice and were captive to the whims of despots and tyrants. The world has changed and there is no one living who can predict what will happen to them in the future one way or another. Still, I fail to see why my life should be placed on hold to accommodate for Susan's big fat mouth when actually they are always playing the field against me behind my back.

Typing Test

2011-12-08T19:37:00.000-08:00

I vaguely remember that during the time I was living in Virginia Beach that some person from the Pat Robertson for President office called me about applying for a job. I went over there and took some sort of maybe a typing test. However, it was too late for me. Within the next week that campaign was over and the office was being dismantled so obviously they never called me back for a job, not that I was expecting anything. It just wasn't meant to be, as they say.

Stupid Letters

2011-12-07T07:02:00.000-08:00

I see no reason why I should apologize to Lori for the fake love letters that my sister wrote unbenknownst to me. My sister and some other girl, a tenth grade classmate of my sister who was in tenth grade at that time, came up with that little plot all on their own without consulting me in any way and I only learned of it after the fact. My mother explained to me that my sister had gone to apologize to Lori and, well, their friendship always was a lot more frosty after that. My sister and that other girl put fake love letters in Lori's locker supposedly addressed from some guy, I am not sure whether real or fictitious. I have no idea where my sister came up with that bizarre scheme but she always did love to pull various pranks. She really doesn't care and in fact enjoys the sight of me getting perturbed at having all my stuff strewn around all over the place. She has no thought or regard for the feelings of the victims of her pranks. In fact, she thinks it is very funny to watch me getting angrier and angrier until finally I reach the boiling point. My mother always told me to ignore her but it's really hard to continue doing that when she just won't stop.

The Problem With Baptists

2011-12-06T07:41:00.000-08:00

The problem with Baptists is that they are not really Spirit-filled Christians. They might be saved but that is about all one can say about the blah boring Baptist Bells and Reeces. Beyond that minor point, the Baptists are indistinguishable from the masses of Christian religiosity, just more purveyors of lifestyle and social standing at whatever the cost may be. The Baptists assail us with curses and slander because, obviously, they are not Spirit-filled Christians. If they were Spirit-filled they wouldn't be saying those things. Their only concern is their social standing in terms of appearances. Do they seem like "good" people? Well, that is nice and well and good, but it does not mean that we are obligated in any way to "like" them. There is no law requiring us to invite the Bells and the Reeces over for dinner and I don't think that we ever did. I do remember being at the Bells' house once or twice and it was always such a boring and miserable experience to be screamed at by Shannon and to have to sit there and listen to Lori's boring Dad, Jerry Reece, talking about how she is pretty enough to be Miss America. She does have a certain flair for looking like a fashion model but I don't remember her ever saying anything of any significance. For them, it's just all about appearances. Beyond that, there is really nothing to say about those boring people. They think that speaking in tongues is of the devil, they don't believe that God heals, they think they know everything, so obviously it would be hard to have any cooperation with them in terms of the local work. Obviously they are not flowing in the Spirit and would be a huge stumbling block if allowed to control us. We give them a little rein in some areas but we have to keep them on a tight rein because we cannot let them run our lives or be in control. They would just run everything into the ground, obviously.

Shoot

2011-12-05T07:31:00.000-08:00

Which does make me wonder where that expression comes from: "Shoot McGroot"? A shortened version of it, just "shoot," was apparently in common circulation in the 1960s, but it wasn't about just randomly shooting people. It was about shooting a certain person who was blamed for everything, a sort of scapegoat you might say, McGroot. Is there a need to pin the blame on someone? Well, the solution is to just "Shoot McGroot"! That apparently solves everything although not really. It is just a joke from more ancient times than I can recall. We children were just the little parrots echoing the joke from an earlier age. McGroot himself might not think it very funny, however, to have everyeone's garbage dumped on him, certainly.

Christmas Junk

2011-12-04T12:37:00.000-08:00

Yes, I fell myself under no obligation to join the mob for Pastor's Christmas Knick-Knack parade. I am not going to say anything about my non-involvement for fear of being labeled some sort of public Scrooge. However, knick knack paddy wack give the dog a bone. Personally speaking, I can't think of a more trivial and worthless cause upon which to waste my time and energies than that of the right of private citizens to force the government to plant manger scenes and creches on public lands. Like, so? And what sort of fruit will this Catholic ritualistic parade of bric-a-brac produce, may I ask? Sometimes these so-called "Southern" pastors get off on these extremist tangents and what can we poor parishioners do about it? Nothing, absolutely nothing. If we force public acceptance of creches and manger scenes, who is going to block the installment of gigantic Buddha statues and various other symbols of polytheistic and pantheistic and occultic religions embraced by these peoples immigrating here from all corners of the planet? I just don't see why anyone would give priority to this type of religious statement at the expense of the true spirit of Christmas. Jesus really was God having taken on flesh, appearing in human form to meet with us here on earth so he is worthy of our praise and worship. However, some symbolic likeness fashioned by human hands just isn't the same thing. I seriously doubt that early Christians placed any faith in artistic representations of Jesus. That stuff developed later. It is good to be reminded of the historical Jesus always. However, God is spirit and the early church knew that true worship is expressed in spirit and in truth. If no manger scenes existed, would it matter? Would the Holy Spirit be any less powerful if we did not have to fill our houses with bells and baubles and other holiday junk for the season, if in fact we were not even able to do so for some unforeseen reason? What does Christmas really mean anyway? It makes you wonder.

Skipping School

2011-12-02T13:51:00.000-08:00

I vaguely remember hearing the story about the younger brother of Libby Penders, the redhead in our high school class, who was removed from school by their mother and forced to stay home and pray because of the impending end of the world as per their Jehovah's Witnesss beliefs. I cannot remember who told me that story or whether there was ever any resolution to that or change in that situation, just that she had a younger brother that no one ever saw because he was not in school. Just because I was never glimpsed in dummies' English, that does not mean that I was not there in school, just never in dummies English. Obviously I am not in any way related to Libby Penders even though she may have red hair although much frizzier than mine and lighter more flaming shade of red as well as freckles and blue eyes. I suppose there are those who think all white people look the same to them but no we are not related to Libby in any way.

Linda Bosley

2011-12-02T08:03:00.000-08:00

We all know that Linda Bosley is just another horrid nasty Baptist bitch, just like all the other mewling cows that are produced by this "process." We don't want Linda Bosley hanging around thinking that we would ever want to be friends with such a nasty horrible person as putrid Linda Bosley and her worthless family. I am just saying that I don't know they find all these fat ugly props for the show because they are nothing "special."

Possessed

2011-12-02T05:49:00.000-08:00

Yes, it is unfortunate that my own sister is possessed by a host of demon spirits. I am not exactly who they all are although I have an idea but they will need to be cast out from my life. I cannot have putrid Linda Bosley demanding my attention. Why should I pretend to care about her screechy-voiced trashy slut daughter? I cannot have these Episcopalian nerds pretending to be Protestants when actually they are much closer to Catholicism than I ever dreamed of. It is hard for those Anglers to understand the radicalness of my faith. They cannot imagine their own sinful condition and are always trying to project it onto me. I remember Pastor Max of one of his stupid idiot lackeys saying that if you criticize somone then you are guilty of what you are criticizing in others. I somewhat disagree with that insinuation. Just because I have accused Pastor Webber of being a child molester, this does not make me guilty of the same sin by virtue of having lodged an accusation, (not that I ever was aware of this to be in a position to accuse ). The truth is that I have not caused any little ones to stumble. If my sister stumbled it was because she tripped herself knowing full well that she should not be running whilst carrying a glass bottle in her hand. I did not trip her. I also ran but did not fall but I did not cause her to fall. It is quite possible that she would not have fallen if she had not been so eager to outrun me but that is her own pride, not my problem.

Sewing

2011-11-30T14:41:00.000-08:00

Back when I was attending CLC not long after college I got into sewing a bit. I made a blouse with a piece of cotton I found somewhere on sale. It was very economical and the pattern was an easy one. I wore it to church and I remember Craig Bolenbaugh kidding me and saying that it looked like I was wearing a tablecloth. So typical of Craig to make all these nasty digs, like I should care what he thinks. Is it my fault that Pam always complained about my clothes, as if I spent a fortune on clothes because I live at home with my parents while she is on her own and with a boyfriend so has to spend all her money on a wedding dress and force her bridesmaids to spend something like $70 or $80 on a dress that I can wear only once, not to mention the matching shoes and other expenses involved, not that I am complaining or anything like that, but really, get real.

Oxymoron

2011-11-30T06:49:00.000-08:00

These TV people offer me nothing but an oxymoron. They say that in Christ we are free and yet they offer me nothing in real terms, nothing but slavery to the horrible Bueno/Hoskins/Connally clan which is composed mostly of people I can't stand anyway. There is something wrong with this picture and I am not sure how to fix it. Christianity is supposed to be a good thing and yet it is a stifling suffocating reality to have any connection to the horrible Bueno/Hoskins clan with their Hideous Horrid Hazel and her petulant bratty sons. They just sit there waiting for me to die. It is unfortunate that we have to live in some geographical proximity to those horrible people because they have a way of poisoning the waters all around them. Unfortunately they have amassed all the money unto themselves so that nobody else can do anything about it.

Voice

2011-11-30T05:40:00.000-08:00

We see that Lee Bueno was cast into the bottomless pit and locked down there where she belongs because nobody wants to hear from those people. Talk about a voice like fingernails on a chalkboard! Just goes to show that if you are loaded with money then everyone has to listen to you even though you are a horribly wicked witch and you are making everyone miserable and ruining our lives just to prove yourself more powerful than us, which actually makes you more like a Druid than a Christian as far as we can tell. There is no love of Christ in you, just lots and lots of money.

Overdue Fines

2011-11-28T17:48:00.000-08:00

I vaguely remember reading some books at Alexandra's house or else somewhere, maybe the Raggedy Ann and Andy and also Pippi Longstocking, the ageless redheaded next door neighbor who is just always there and will not be disappearing any time soon, and also the Narnia books. These are children's books some of which I might have read at the school library, although I really don't remember. It's not like I have these books in my possession at this time so I do not owe any overdue fines to the library or to Alexandra either for that matter so there is nothing else to say about that. I vaguely remember that Alexandra moved away to Afghanistan and we never saw her again after that. So there is nothing else to add to this story. I cannot spend the rest of my life remembering every book I ever read in my childhood. I read lots of books in my younger days so that would a hopelessly monumental task, but at least more entertaining than trying to read all the literature produced by 19th century missionaries about China. It was a different world back then and people talked and wrote and thought differently. You are just not going to find us having written anything like "Chinese Characteristics," written by Arthur H. Smith, not to be confused with my great-grandmother's cousin Arthur D. Smith, as fascinating for the author's attitude and viewpoint as for anything he may have said actually said about Chinese people. You can't talk about these people from more than 100 years ago and expect us to know what you are talking about. You are just barking up the wrong tree, that's all.

Movies

2011-11-28T11:03:00.000-08:00

Yes, I vaguely remember that Alexandra invited my sister to see the movie "Oliver Twist." I was also invited to that movie or else another movie but I declined to go saying that I was not allowed to see movies or that I did not believe in going to the movies or something like that because actually it was against the rules for missionaries and we weren't supposed to be doing that and we knew that. René came home from seeing "Oliver Twist" in a state of stupor and ecstasy, singing these songs "Consider Yourself At Home" and other songs and also talking about the movie based on Charles Dickens' fictional tale of orphan boys in 19th century England. At the same time, René and the other girls decided that I was just a complete idiot because of not going to the movies. Later I did agree to movies with them because I realized that if I play by the rules I lose out on having any friends or anything to do and just sit home alone while my sister is out on the town. Even my own mother ridiculed me for complaining about their mistreatment of me, saying that I was the one who said it was against the rules so obviously they are going to think that I am obnoxious. I can't expect to make friends that way, now can I? At the same time it is also true that if I do not play by the rules and go to the movies I still lose because obviously it is against the rules and it really wasn't my idea to break the rules in the first place. That was my sister's idea. So basically I can't win this game. I made the mistake of stating the rule in the first place and so I will always look like a hypocrite to them when actually they are the ones who are the devil's advocate, always tantalizing with these tempting movies and yet never really accepting the fact that we don't really need them and their stupid movies that were not really that great anyway and anyway salvation is not conditioned on whether or not I went to see a movie. God forgives me for that so it's not about going to hell if I go to the movies. It's more personal than that. Am I going to let this world conform me into its image and likeness which is what movies are all about? When you adapt your life to the movie culture you begin to think like them and act like them. The makers of movies shape your thought patterns in conformance to wordliness and after a while you are a tasteless Christian. The salt loses its savor and must be thrown out to the world because it is not setting the culture but is rather being driven by the culture. The Christian is supposed to be doing the opposite. We are supposed to be a city set on a hill, a light in the darkness to show the way. We cannot let the stupid movie makers tell us what to think. Who are those pagan druid movie makers anyway? They skew everything according to whatever sells but that doesn't make it right. I am just saying that there is plenty of pathetically bad movie stuff on TV without paying extra money to see it at the box office and thereby incurring the wrath of Springfield. So while we understand the logic behind movie rules, we are no longer missionaries and thus no longer Catholics in this matter of box office idolatry. The pope does not tell me whether or not I can go to the movies. The law is one thing and yet the reasons not to bother going to the movies are many. My sister never did share my opinions in this regard which matters not to me. I still rarely go to the movies and if I do go it's usually disappointing somehow. It's really not that exciting to experience the Pirates of the Caribbean selling their souls to the devil. It's actually kind of sick and scary.

Yearbook

2011-11-28T07:23:00.000-08:00

Leafing through my ninth grade yearbook I see the photos of two sisters, Alexandra and Susan Winkelman. Who on earth are those people? I have no memory of them. Certainly they would have nothing to say to me after so many years and I also have nothing to say to them even if we did go to the same high school. It just doesn't matter anymore.

Cherry Tree

2011-11-27T12:02:00.000-08:00

George Washington confessed to chopping down the cherry tree because, as he told his father, he could not tell a lie. That's amazing, sort of an ideal that we all perhaps should aspire to emulate. However, it is probably not possible to not tell a lie. I personally would not want to claim that I never told a lie. As soon as I would say that the devil would be there at my side reminding me of some long forgotten lie that I may have said, some incident of youth or childhood best left buried under the forgiveness of the blood that Christ shed on the cross. I don't really remember when I lied or what I said but it is quite possible that I did lie at some time in my life, a huge disappointment no doubt to Grandpa McClellan and yet indicative of the fact that I, like all members of the human race, am affected by the curse of sin in this world. Jesus' death and resurrection was all about forgiveness and redemption, not about anyone being the "best." Only Jesus lived the perfect sinless life.

These Pagan Southern Baptists

2011-11-27T10:52:00.000-08:00

It is amazing how these Southern-Fried Baptists pretend to be Pentecostal Christians and at the same time they teach us about magical spells and potions. They tell me that if I say that I am a grasshopper, that I will become a grasshopper. That is so ridiculous. I will not be a grasshopper no matter what stupid thing I might say. No combination of magical words or chanted spells will ever convert my human body into that of a grasshopper. Sure, it would be a stupid thing to say but I never said that and even if I had said that it wouldn't be true. It would just be a lie. Thus, I never described myself as a grasshopper, nor am I a liar in that sense. I might have once or so likened myself to a turtle but not in a literal sense, obviously. Only in the sense of having a thick hide to protect myself from danger. Thus, I am neither a turtle nor a grasshopper. I am a human being just like you and do not deserve to be kicked around in this way. It's just ridiculous. This is just further proof that these people that one sees at church and even in the choir are not necessarily Christians. They might even be pagan Druid witches. How would I know? They appear as angels of light but then later you realize you were talking to the devil. Scary.

Bill

2011-11-27T10:15:00.000-08:00

Why is everyone expecting me to pay for everything? I can't possibly pay the Baptists' many bills. I don't even have any idea what all they have done to other people, only the nasty stuff they did to me, and there is no reason why I should pay for stuff I don't know anything about. It just isn't fair.

Turkey Me

2011-11-26T16:16:00.000-08:00

Yes, that was so embarrassing to admit, at age nine in fourth grade, that I still believed in Santa Claus. It was so utterly humiliating to be told that it was just my parents making me look like a fool. Cheryl always knew there was no Santa Claus so how could I have been so stupid as to take for granted that what my parents were telling me was true? How could I be so naive as to stupidly believe that there actually was a Jolly Ol' St. Nick who flies around on a sleigh every Christmas Eve dropping off toys for little boys and girls who are good? I always believed that I was good because every Christmas morning because there were the toys under the tree from Santa, and also the milk and cookies were gone, but now I am starting to wonder. Perhaps it was all just a ruse. Like Cheryl was saying, all that time it was just my parents who went to the store and bought things and gift wrapped them and put them under the tree. And they expected me to stupidly believe that an old bearded fat man would ever do me any favors. How wrong they were and how stupid I was to just accept this farce at face value. And yet even now society conspires to make little boys and girls believe in this mythical red-capped personage, he of the fur-trimmed sleeves. Why did I not rise up and seize the truth? After all, praxis demands that the people rise up and liberate themselves from these theological traps, to shake off these misty myths fogging their clarity of thought, these boondoggles that are imposed by the ruling classes. And yet there I was at age eight stupidly pondering whether the lights of an airplane flying overhead on Christmas Eve might actually be Santa on his sleigh. Yes, I was pathetically stupid at age 8 and even age 9. So what can I say? I was just wrong, hopelessly utterly humiliatingly wrong. Wrong. What part of wrong do you not know how to spell? All this stupid stuff about Santa is just W-R-O-N-G.

Alabama Loser

2011-11-25T13:18:00.000-08:00

Yes, I do know one other person from Alabama, that pathetically wimpy loser Tim Connally. I always did have no respect or regard for that obnoxious Alabama pestilence of Southeastern alumni who imagine themselves somehow better while their own rotten attitude belies their uselessness. Of course, I never liked Tim Connally ever and always thought he was a total creep, classic example of pretentious PK, long before he was diagnosed with Parkinsons and wasted away to nothingness. I guess that his wife, that viciously hideous bitch Christie Gladstone, got what she deserved when she married that Deep South blob of nothingness, just riding on the coattails of their pretentious parents. Obviously those two pathetically stupid people do not deserve to have children and yet they have maybe five of them, not that I ever said anything about that. So we see that one cannot always say who does or does not deserve to have children. Perhaps the children will do fine as adults in spite of their having such pathetically horrible parents. Yes, it wouldn't be fair to judge the Connally kids by their horribly worthless parents, at least in my opinion.

Yes, so how do I tell that horrible woman Raeann to butt out of my personal life? I just can't stand those people and never want to do any ministry projects with them ever in this lifetime. Once was bad enough. Surely God would not curse me with any future attachment to Raeanne and her horrible daughters because personally I just can't stand those people and hopefully they will get a clue, too, that they have no place in my life and ministry, thanks anyway.