Yes, truly, I am not a dues-paying member of the Calkins Family Association. I came by the name in the normal way, by being born with my father's surname on my birth certificate. And then there are those other people who pay their Association dues so that they can pretend to be related to us, even though they did not get the name in the legitimate way. There is a collection of New Money corporate snobs and Old Money aristocrats who are hanging by a thread to the memory of old-time Calkins glories, but they do not really have the name, so what would they know? For what do I need sicko Bill? For what do I need Rockefeller's Haitian garbage dumpster? For what do I need that guy in Atlanta? Those people have no privileges for telling me what to do with my life. They are merely the dues-paying fringe, useful only insofar as they finance the Association projects and events, whatever the Association wants to do about that I have no idea, and that is as far as that gets. Maybe someday it would be interesting to sign up for that, but it is not necessary. It is also possible to be a Calkins and not pay dues to the Association. Either way, I am a Calkins and you are not.
