Which Reminds Me

Oh, ha ha ha! Something about Miss Calkins' Select School in Washington, D.C. As if that had anything to do with me. I have been asked once or twice what I know about the Secret Service people who protect the president and I said then, as I say now, that I only remember reading about them in newspapers and magazines, something about the odd little nicknames they give to the people they are protecting. Ok, whatever. Obviously I have no personal connection to that. To claim otherwise would only be to make myself a national joke which would not be to my life and work given that my unique personality is no way a clone of some other Miss Calkins. I am just saying.

Which Reminds Me

It is interesting to note the existence of Miss Mary Whiton Calkins, a famous person person of my surname. I have been almost unaware of this person's existence most of the time so I really have no intelligent commentary to offer on the subject of her. I do not wish to disrespect her academic achievements. I doubt that I could pass the doctoral exam of Harvard, as she did, for starters, so I really do not feel myself qualified to comment on the various writings of Miss Calkins that are part of the literature of philosophy and psychology. I see that she has had her place at the table in the existential sense, never mind about Professor Perry. Although it may be useful to Criticize with a big capital C, these tidbits alone do not constitute a Confederacy of Miss Calkins. What a headache to be see that someone is expecting to be constituted a clone of Miss Calkins. It is not possible for me to share the consciousness of Mary. I am only conscious that I know almost nothing about her and really don't mind not being her. My knowledge of psychology is not very deep but that never did interest me very much anyway. Contemplating one's own naval only gets you so far and then you have to go out and get a job and work.

Which Reminds Me

I do vaguely remember that the family photo collection at one time included a photo of a certain Mr. Lee, possibly a Chinese person, although no information is given. There is no context to explain this photo other than my great-grandparents at one time lived in China and had various photos of unknown persons there, most of these without names. That was 100 years ago and there is no way for us to track these people. I just have no idea.

Which Reminds Me

I really shouldn't have to explain that my name is not Clara and that I have never lived in Santa Clara, California, nor been taught school in New York that I should run for president there. We do have some distant unknown relatives who live there, in San Jose that is, but I have never met them, nor been invited to meet them, nor is there any reason to go there to meet them as they don't seem to want to communicate with us anyway. Some busybody has been busy punning about them all over the place but this is meaningless. There is nothing that I can say publicly about them that would mean anything. Hopefully, God will take care of them.

Which Reminds Me

I really am wondering how it is that my name accidentally got linked to that of shrill Italian hag Jennie Cerrullo. Just because we coincidentally attended the same college at about the same time, that does not mean that I would want my name linked to her birth control ministry or to be reminded of her snarky cheerleader pomp. I suppose that the cheerleaders by now have found their places somewhere in the sewers of life after college but I never cared to spend much time chatting with those dull boring cheerleaders who seem to have no conception of persons outside of themselves. I might have other plans for myself and my life that in now way would involve them if only I could dig myself out of this hole. I suppose that it would be kind if some people would send Jennie some money so that we don't have to listen to her obnoxious fundraising appeals.

Which Reminds Me

I don't remember this clearly but I do seem to remember Elizabeth Iaturro singing the praises of Jennie Cerrullo, an Italian who has a Ph.D. and has served as a school principal and has a ministry that is always in need of additional funding. Ok, fine. That's nice. But do you have to make it sound like Jennie is taking money away from me when I never was expecting anything from them anyway and don't really care what they do in the first place? Nasty Italian dogs such as Elizabeth Iaturro seem to take a special delight in tormenting white people such as myself with all of this garbage for whatever reason, as if they were expecting me to prove something or provide some ethnic object lesson. As if law requires that I establish some fundraising ministry for public display just because. Um, not really. As if I should care about that when God would not be calling me merely to serve their hunger for self-glorification. I would be expecting to get married eventually and then the opinion of some stupid Italian dog just won't matter. After I get married and have a husband to pay my bills I won't have to feel all this pressure to accomplish something that I really don't care about anyway all by myself with no one to help me and surrounded by all these Italian dogs all ready and eager to spite me and ridicule my every move. So, anyway, now all I need is a husband to pay my bills. Or a paycheck. Or both. I do not share Elizabeth Iaturro's aversion to marriage. I think that I would get married if Mr. Right ever appeared on the scene. Anyway, money makes the world go round, as the song goes. Without money I am just dead in the water.

Which Reminds Me

How many times do I have to explain that my family was never part of the KKK and we are not in need of any racial reeducation program. You obviously have gotten us confused with some distant cousins such as the Cranfords who do have deep roots there but I never met them and they are not our problem. Enough said about that.