Which Reminds Me

And whatever happened to Jim Laurie? I hope he realizes that nobody wants to hear another word out of him ever again. He was nothing. I once gave him a ride in my car, although I don't remember why. I only remember that he worked at a bank and was a co-worker of Michelle. There is nothing else to say about him.

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Yes, that was nice of Dauna to come and get me at the bus stop that one time, so maybe I owe you a ride to the Public grocery store at some time or another. That said, I will not ever be returning to the Miss Knox place in Yuma, so you can just forget about trying to reconnect me to Arizona. That just ain't going to happen.

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One day at Oakland park, at the youth group, Craig BB asked if I had made the blouse I was wearing. Upon answering yes, he said that it looked like I had cut up some curtains. Was that a compliment? Thanks. Whatever.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, really, for what do we need another clueless French bird in the family? Already the French birds make disfuncationally disproportionately too much noise of not really so very much importance given the whole scheme of things.

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Yes, and what does a photograph of a sailor chancing to appear in the family photo box have to do with the idiotic rantings of Orson Welles, a Hollywood actor, about how he does not believe in prophecy? That means nothing.

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Yes, I vaguely remember that Vickie said that Shannon said something negative that Brett's wife said about Brett. And what was said I have no idea. Perhaps there was a mistake there somehow but I do not know enough about that to have an opinion.

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Yes, in a way it is sad to leave Java Boy there hung by his toenails, but he does not deserve any further commentary after that. Needless to say.

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Yes, I vaguely recall during high school having lunch with my mother at that restaurant inside of which all of the decor is reminiscent of Don Quixote and Sancho Panza. Various sculptures or paintings on the wall evoke the characters from the well-known story of classic Spain. And what of that?

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As you can see, I never got very much from them. I think that it would not be appropriate for me to consult them on these points. They should be explaining themselves to the judges, if they can. Needless to say.

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We often hear a lot of chattering about Nazis, even though we do not consider ourselves such and are not aware of any Nazis. And even if I did happen to meet some Nazi somewhere, how would I know that? There is no law requiring Nazis to wear little swastika badges on their clothing. But you don't need me to explain that.

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Yes, I would agree that I really cannot be a judge in a case where I am actually the plaintiff, not really the defendant, under fire from the inexplicably defenseless defendant, not that I would actually think of suing, but if I had no choice but to set the record straight for the sake of posterity and/or future persons who might stumble upon this anomalous point, then so be it.

Which Reminds Me

When it comes to the story of the turtle or the hare, I mostly identify with the turtle, seeing how that sometimes fools rush in where angels fear to tread. So, yes, your "up" being based on the early bird gets the worm schemata, means that johnny-come-latelies are left scrounging through the garbage can for whatever is left over. In view of this point, where is the carrot stick for the turtle who crosses over the finish line? Time has wreaked its havoc and with all of the damage already done, the culprits who did that to me can now get off scot-free and no one is the wiser for it. And how is that fair? I think NOT.

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Yes, I do remember something, but I only heard it once so I really cannot quite remember the details of that, beyond an awareness that it is not really what most people think, a completely different thing. And why so eager to dismantle the foundations of Western Civilization, a college class in which I got mostly As? If it ain't broke...

Which Reminds Me

Yes, what was that ridiculous thing that Jan Green said? Or else June. I don't remember what or who said that. The whole thing flew out of my head at the point of finding myself cornered as if a wild animal, because obviously I cannot be expected to defend that. Needless to say. Speak for yourself if you can, but if you cannot, well, that's just too bad.

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Yes, whatever happened to my painting of a tree in high school art class? I did not bring that home with me.

Which Reminds Me

So you bought your Win-D and therefore that is all you can get. I do not think that it is fair for you to buy Win-D and then expect to get me also in the bargain. This is not a 2-for-1 deal here, never mind about some irrelevant Rich Mullins song. 

Which Reminds Me

Well, la di dah! So you bet your entire house on the idiotic rantings of Win-D. That was your bad investment, NOT mine. I certainly cannot go through life saddled with the idiotic example of what NOT to do so prominently provided by David and his little strumpet Win-D. Needless to say.

Which Reminds Me

I am not theoretically or in principle averse to the idea of contributing offerings and money to various programs of social and philanthropic benefit to the poor and needy, assuming that I had the money available to do that. However, such is not the case at the present moment, and unless and until the money is available and controlled by me, myself and I, I will continue to look upon such programs in an abstract and theoretical way as good for rich people who have nothing else to do with all of that surplus money, but which may or may not find a place on my list of priorities depending on when and if any surplus money should ever become available for me to make such decisions for myself absent any sort of legalistic pressure from the many and variegated parachurch organizations continually pressuring the public to assist with needs that certainly are legitimate but which also must be weighed in the balance with pressures and requests from local churches, rescue missions, and other sociological organizations locally, all being of merit and deserving being assisted by a portion of the money derived from the mandate of the 10 percent tithe, which is not a very large number when the income is almost non-existent. Which perhaps contributes to impression that parachurch groups only care about rich people.

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Yes, I am not in a very good position to say what I really think about Bob. When will that cranky old coot, Mr. Honkinidiot, hurry up and finally kick the bucket so that we can clear the decks and be rid of all of these curses that he has heaped upon my head for whatever it was that they did? Inquiring minds want to know that, but I don't have near the power and money needed to be able to fix that.

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Yes, I once made some sort of commentary about that to David Davenport, which comes back around garbled into a strange and nearly unrecognizable format. I cannot quite remember what I actually said or why that was on my mind Thus, it logically follows that I will never again have another conversation with blithering idiot David, who cannot be trusted for anything. David, keep your stupid mouth shut.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I vaguely remember that during high school, there was a singer who sang at one or another of the school assemblies, Evangelina Sol, who was not bad really, if you like that type of music. Apparently she has gone for training in New York, trained to stand in a certain way and so forth. But then later I heard that she got married and no more has been heard about her musical career. I really would not know anything about that. Whatever.

Which Reminds Me

I think that medical doctors are well paid for their services. No one wants to seem ungrateful for that, and yet there is no special race of doctor's kids (DKs). Needless to say.

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Why am I still hearing so much noise from a creepy little weasel Max and his evil Aunt Cheater? It was a big mistake to invite those people along on our walk. How did all of these clueless people turn the beautiful scenery of a nature hike into a huge nightmare? There is no place for them here.

Can you not spell T-R-A-I-N W-R-E-C-K?

Which Reminds Me

And did it not occur to you that such a detailed report might be rather shocking to our high school classmate Lorena Castro? How might such a refugee from Cuba feel upon hearing of this foiled plot to assassinate her estranged uncle or distant cousin or something?

Actually, no, I had not thought of that. Was she in our classroom at the time or did she hear about this by hearsay? Even so, it was not I who delivered Raymond's report. What would I know about this particular concatenation of events? I mostly try to steer clear of these scary people because these matters are too complicated for me.

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Yes, I cannot say that it was not a little bit creepy to hear your very detailed account of the failed attempt to assassinate Castro in the 1960s, including names of the would-be assassin and other facts about that, delivered in your high school report. Who would even think of such a thing? How do you have access to all of this top secret information about CIA operations of the 1960s unless the mafia killer was somehow your acquaintance or third cousin or something. I don't understand where that comes from. I did not take very good notes that day so will not be able to regurgitate that. Needless to say.

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Yes, in a way it is sad, myself having to commit suicide rather than be ruled by the horrid nasty corporate executives on the board of Intra-Publix of NYC. Needless to say.

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You were telling me that Nicky Cruz, who lives in Colorado, formerly of NY and PR, thinks that he might be distantly related to my high school classmate, Patty Cruz, in Central America. I really would not know anything about that. I never discussed anything of that nature with PC. She sits there in study hall reading out of Kahlil Gibran which is about the only thing that I can remember about her. You could always ask Kathy. Weren't they best buddies in high school. Let Patty and Kathy explain their Aryan scenario. I never really heard an explanation of that, although incidentally I might have hard that one of our classmates might have been of Persian origin. Who am I to question these arbitrary rulings of the CIA kids?

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Yes, why are all of these PR whiners pretending to be attached to me? I am not very connected to the Caribbean that I would have much of anything to say about bankrupted islands that were in ancient times the center of the Spanish conquest and empire but in our days have not so much to boast of. The number 50 sounds like a nice round even number to me. But if we start adding PR, why stop at 51? There is also the Virgin Islands, Guam, etc. etc.

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Yes, I know, they just want to make it a game about male vs. female, thus to distract attention from the linguistical point that matters, so the game as they play it is brown male trumps white female, and thus they win automatically no matter what I might say or NOT say about anything. So obviously I never could win this game from the starting point and am not interested in continuing this ridiculous and useless exercise in futility.

Which Reminds Me

Oh, were you saying that Eric was from Idaho or thereabouts? I don't know that I ever knew that, but even so, I really could not care less about Idaho per se, that would not mean very much to me. Idaho is just another one of 50 possible states of the union where people might go to live, which does not include the anomalous creature known as Puerto Rico. Will there ever be a 51st state? It is not my job to advocate on that point one way or another. Tell Puerto Rico go hire a lobbyist, not to expect me to do it for them.

Which does not explain why the idiots of the college "theater club" are screaming at me. There is nothing that I can think of that I would need to discuss with them. I long ago told Eric that I am not interested and to stop following me around like a sick puppy dog. Needless to say.

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Yes, one day during college some of us were goofing around in some classrooms at  night, and the result of that was that for about one month I had this annoying obnoxious person named Eric following me all over campus like a sick puppy dog, and finally I had to kindly tell him that I am really not interested in getting serious with him and hopefully he will find some other girlfriend, not me. A few years later I hard that Eric had died and that some of his friends were trying to attach him to me anyway, even though he died and anyway I was not interested in the first place. What part of NO do these clueless "theater club" people not understand?

Which Reminds Me

How many times do I have to explain that I have 0, as in ZERO, political information about Heather. You could always ask Kathy. I imagine that she probably has a jackpot of information about that, but none of that trickles down to me, and maybe it is just as well that I not be bothered with political problems of the 1970s. They never tell me anything. Needless to say. So basically I have no connection whatever to them. Bye!

Which Reminds Me

Ah yes, how well I remember the sound of Libby's fingernails on the chalkboard, an adequate summary of the what I remember about Libby.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, now that we have returned to the United States, why are we still hearing the shrill voice of the haughty arrogant nasty hateful Libby blob? We had thought to be rid of her, but apparently life is more complicated than that.

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While working on the high school paper, my editor thanked me for grammatical improvements that I made to her editorial piece, whatever it was about I don't remember. She liked that I made it flow or read more smoothly. Yes, too bad you never had the advantage or benefit of my editing skills to reorganize your empty head, but too late now for that. You deserve to reap what you sowed.

Which Reminds Me

Anyway, I do not recall anyone asking Libby to sing a solo in the high school musical. Needless to say. Squawk squawk! Screech screech!

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Yes, that was nice of Steve Brown to nominate me, but it was not a very practical idea that would create many unnecessary problems for me which would not exist if I simply do not bother to run for office.

Which Reminds Me

I never liked the idea of running for election. During high school the one time that I was nominated I requested to have my name erased from the list on the blackboard because I don't have any illusions about being elected for any office, so why bother with the inevitable humiliation of not being elected? Better to just leave my name off the list of potential candidates because, anyway, that fictional election story in circulation is not really about me, obviously.

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Yes, I think that it is probably safe to assume that Tinker never won any beauty contest, whether based on brains, beauty or popularity. I once made the mistake of having a conversation with her and now the Tinker creature thinks that it owns me. Wrong!

Which Reminds Me

Yes, there probably is some good reason why those other girls are stuck forever in Dummies English class. How can we brilliant genius shine with them always throwing noisy tinker tantrums? Yes, it was probably for the best.

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Yes, I vaguely remember seeing the name of Anita Stone printed in our high school yearbook, adjacent to the face of her. Even so, we never talked. It is a bit late now for me to go back and pretend that the Stones were anybody worth mentioning.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, we are vaguely aware that Libby lives in her own private Puerto Rico bubble, to which we are  completely indifferent. If she had something personal to say... But no, all of this noise is not really Libby, is it? It is really just a pack of Puerto Rican street thugs who go around beating up white girls. Needless to say.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, why all of this excessive disdain? Something smells fishy rotten in Denmark. They never said anything to us about really being more Danish than Dutch. Only by osmosis do we disdain to explore the question of Dutch v. Danish. Only by osmosis do we begin to speculate about a political cousin named Bill whom they never mentioned to us. If they never say anything to us about that, how can we be expected to comment or "help" with that? We don't anything about that.