Which Reminds Me

When I was living in California, Alana Haze called me on the telephone to fill my ear with all her emotional problems, her sordid affair with that guy in the youth group at church which now disqualified her for marriage to Loren and also about Carol, Mark's former girlfriend, oh I didn't know that, who supposedly tried to slit her wrists but apparently she was found before having bled to death, after having performed some strange athletics with Mark at a party, but that was before my arrival, although Alana was not clear on the details because they were in another room, so that was a sad story. Actually, the more I think about this, the more I do not want to be bothered with learning more about the personal problems of these white trash California people so I will be moving away soon. Strange how when you meet Alana at church she seems like a rational, reasonable person, but then when she calls you on the phone you are surprised to learn how sick she really is.

Which Reminds Me

Anyway, I never had much connection to the Bakker Show. I never went to North Carolina or had acquaintance with any of those people in any kind of personal way. I might have glanced the show on TV once or twice but am not aware of any Bakker Acting.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I almost forgot. You were saying that you were going to "Baker Act" me. Did I say something about being suicidal? I hope you weren't taking something too seriously. Actually, no, you are not entitled to "Baker Act" me. Coincidentally, the only discussion of the other "Baker Act" that I can recall at the moment is a conversation with Jill Anderson, who was explaining to us the meaning of that in California legal terms. If your psychiatrist thinks that you are suicidal, they are under an obligation to have you arrested and turned over to the authorities for your own protection. Jill's sister is a licensed psycho so she really knows all about these things. So I mainly understand the definition of "Baker Act" because of something that Jill said, not because of myself being suicidal. It is not a criminal offense to be depressed about future prospects. You are only eligible to be "Baker Acted" if you actually try to do that, which I heard of someone who tried to slit their wrists with a razor blade, but failed to die, but that was not me. That was someone else, not me.

Which Reminds Me

One cannot help but ask why are the fat ugly hogs of Iowa screaming and throwing things at me? But I have no thought of Iowa. I have no idea who those people are or why I should care about that?

Which Reminds Me

Recently, upon reading the diaries of great-grandmother, we learn that she stopped in Iowa in 1960 to visit the Butterfield cousins. That is the only time that Iowa is ever mentioned in any type of family context. If I had not read the diaries I never would have had any thought of Iowa. Since the Butterfields were always busying moving around the globe, it was always so hard for us to keep track of them. Where were in the world were they and why should we care about Iowa? Iowa is a place of no interest to me, a place that I have ever been and would not care to go given its reputation for extremely cold winters and utter irrelevance to anything that matters. A Square Deal to me would be to lop Iowa off the map and sell it to Canada but I really have the wherewithal to do that.

Which Reminds Me

During the one year I was at Evangel, I believe that it was Marge Couch who was proud to be an 'Okie,' but whatever. I have no personal attachment to the state of OK, thus to avoid any omissions on this point. In fact, on the one hand I feel that it would be my pleasure to help with the Okie roast. Therein lies the temptation. But on the other hand I really shouldn't take the pleasure in the misfortunes of Okies. That wouldn't be nice, to roast Okies just to make myself feel better, thus stooping down myself to their low level of understanding and comprehension. The rain falls alike on the just and the unjust. So disasters don't necessarily tell the whole story.

Which Reminds Me

When I was at Evangel college I remember someone making notice of the song that describes them as "proud to be an Okie from Muskogee." However, I never imagined that song was referring to the Hurds of Muskegon and/or Michigan, but if you want to build a case for that nonsensical and worthless point, there is no law to prevent you from making a huge mess of everything. Unfortunately.