Which Reminds Me

Yes, how many do we have to explain to these methodically stupid snappy-trash sluts of Michigan that there is no Harvey at this address? For further information on the history of Methodism and its Indian adherents, we will refer all questions to the mainline institutions that are the repositories of archival data on the subjects of Harvey, Helen, etc. I just have no idea what these stupid people think they are doing here.

Which Reminds Me

I wonder what makes the pathetically stupid people of North Carolina imagine what I would want a piece of the junk that emanates from Linda's ex-husband, of whom the only thing that I remember hearing is that he was from North Carolina. I never even so much as met Linda's first husband so obviously I am not your ex-wife. It is perhaps fortunate for you that I do not have many guns available to me or your ex-wife Linda's empty brains might be found all over the place. But as things now stand, your ex-wife was sold off and is now the property of Alabama, not that she was ever a friend of mine, so there is actually nothing that I need to say about that. Only because you asked do I offer in response this truncated commentary.

Which Reminds Me

Well, all I can say is that if you are looking to defend yourself against the Spanish Armada, you probably shouldn't put too much faith in the Spanish Netherlands. Going Dutch might have worked fine in the 1600s but nowadays it doesn't get you very far in the long run. Holland just isn't what it used to be.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I do remember that someone was accusing us or recognizing us, I was not sure which, for being the caulkers who built the boats that defeated the Spanish Armada, and how they need us to help with similar services in the present day. However, so far I haven't found where that came from. I was not sure what that meant.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, it does get confusing. I never had strong feelings about Andrew Jackson one way or another, always nice to see a familiar face on the $20 bill but not really sure who decides which face should go there. I do not feel myself compelled to participate in bashing of Andrew Jackson that is perpetuated at the Richmond meeting ad infinitum, so does that make me a Confederate rebel? A quick review of history shows that Andrew Jackson was a stickler on points of legal tender, even to the point of dueling to the death, thus shooting a man dead, to defend his marital honor, even though it might actually have been his own wife's sloppy paperwork that provoked a crisis. Fortunately for us the obligation of dueling is no longer extant in the land, and yet the history of Jackson's confused affairs will always be there in the history books perhaps to prove a point. We want our legal tender to matter and have actual face value. So why are people obsessing about all this no-value counterfeit paperwork?

Most people just think that Andrew Jackson was a patriotic military hero in defending the shores of America against an invading army. Most people in the armed forces would probably do the same under orders in certain circumstances. So?

Which Reminds Me

During my senior year of high school, I remember that Vickie gave me a copy of Seventeen magazine but with two or three pages cut out. I checked that with the copy of the magazine on file in the high school library and saw that it was an article about the Exorcist, featuring a large photograph of Linda with her head all twisted around backward, a strange grimace on her face. So that was what Vickie was trying to hide from me, however unsuccessfully because Vickie was never my only source of information.

Which Reminds Me

It is hard for us to understand why they are so proud of their worthless Saddletrash connections. No one actually cares what the dreary Warren family does. We are not related to them, fortunately for us. The only thing I can remember about Vanessa is the time that she ate a jalapeño pepper thinking that it was a pickle. Maybe that explains how she grew up to be a snarky little sourpuss, but I really wouldn't know. I mostly avoid those snarky people.

Which Reminds Me

If you want to make a point about the miserable lives of harem women who live isolated in separate houses alone with their children, competing with multiple wives for the favors of a distant polygamous father who is rarely seen or heard of, it is not necessary to go Mormon. All we have to do is read that book by Anna Leonowens, "The English Governess at the Siamese Court," who provides a very intelligent description of that. Skip the silly musical. Stick to the historical account and we get the idea well enough. No need to belabor the point. We don't want to actually do that, only read the book which we read some time ago. It was a very interesting story, from a British point of view obviously.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I do recall hearing that my great-grandparents were missionaries in China in about the 1910s. There is some thought or idea that after the Christian missionaries had planted a church there, the Mormons came in afterward and stole away some of the progress made there by the Christians by the condoning of polygamy, so that what remains of the original church is no longer something that the Christian missionaries would want to claim as their handiwork. We are really not interested in further discussing this point with persons who really don't get it.

Which Reminds Me

I played by the rules of Sorry and yet they forced me to lose the game. What nerdy geek bothers to read the paper with all the rules of the game? No, it is not about the fine print. It's just about whatever they say. They were not aware of this obscure rules that allows me to skip around the board so therefore the rule no longer exists, because, like I said, it's not about the printed rules. It's just about whatever they say are the rules. So probably I shouldn't have gotten angry and flung a yellow piece on the floor and broke it and then stomped out of the room when the element of luck did not go my way that time. Even so, I prefer to play by the rules of the game, because anyway, there are many things they don't know. They are just bluffing their way to nowhere in my opinion. And yet if they kill me first I won't be able to protest later. I will just be dead later and it will just be whatever they said. So, yes, there is a certain logic to their game, and yet I don't care what they say.

Which Reminds Me

When I was doing my family research, I happened to notice that my cousins, the Butterfields, have a "Downey" surname in their past. Their father was Arthur Butterfield and his mother was Ruth Downey. I don't know if anyone else in our family ever noticed that. It is not like they ever tell us anything. I have no idea whether this explains the Butterfield cousins' obsession about posing with the "Uppity-Ups." I have no idea why this obsession with Ups and Downs." To me it just all sounds like a roller coaster ride. But the rest of us don't have this "Downey" problem. It is just all their problem, not mine.

Which Reminds Me

One Sunday while living in California I visited a church in Santa Ana and was wandering around looking for the appropriate Sunday School room. I walk into one room and this woman whose name I do not recall walks up to me and asks me where is my husband. I say that I don't have one, that I am not married, and she is horrified to hear it. Don't I know that this is the couples classroom? Suddenly Tim Cederblom appears to escort me to the proper college/career classroom. I never return to that church for many many years. They really should mark their classrooms more carefully to help newcomers find their way around without experiencing such negative incidents of unfortunately getting lost, and also I cannot have Tim imagining that he will be running my life ever in this lifetime. The Cedar tree imagines they can run me around in circles for their own amusement but actually I will not be available to them in future. So obviously I cannot return there. The couples can sling mud all they want at me and I never get a chance to return mail it back to them.

Which Reminds Me

We were at Pam's house and a lot of people were talking about Angie and Judie, of whom I have no direct information. Someone was cattily remarking about how Angie looked like a movie star the day that she was presented at the open convention of Florida district, escorted by Bob Hoskins. I wasn't there at the time so obviously I only know what someone else said about that. Maybe Linda would remember more about that because she stays in touch with those people. That was Linda talking about how Judy is appalled that Angie is dating a non-Christian. But I really don't know anything. I only overheard something that Linda said.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, it does seem very awkward. How do we fire this Wicked Webber when such prominent persons are so protective of his Arkansas-based network? I don't very much about that. I am not in a good position to assist with the prosecution of the Webbers.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, it does seem odd that all these people whom I am barely aware of and often not would go to such great lengths to stab me in the back so viciously and then pretend as if nothing happened, as if it was all my fault, as if I had done something wrong in the distant past that I have long since forgotten. If Julie Andrews must have done something good, then the reverse is not necessarily true that I must have done something bad. Maybe it is just something beyond my control. How well I remember Cori complaining of being sent on a guilt trip, and yet somehow if they do that to me, well, I'm nobody. My feelings don't matter to them. They have no qualms about throwing fits and screaming at me and fashioning false allegations. Basically, they just don't care so why should I care about them? Actually, I don't care anymore. Scratch what I said in earlier times. I no longer care what they say. They are nobody important. In future, I will have no qualms about turning them over to the authorities.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I did once interview for a job at that place on Gateway, sat around a table to be questioned by four or five poeple, but they never called me back so one logically assumes that they will not need me for anything.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I think I did mention the super embarrassing bathroom incident to someone, maybe Linda Harrington or Jill Anderson or someone else, I'm not sure, and they told me that I was not the first person to make that mistake, that other female persons had done the same thing. Ok, so at least it was not just me. I had thought it was just my stupid mistake. I wasn't sure how I had gotten so confused. Maybe there was something wrong with my brain.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I do remember that Marty Robertson was a very accomplished comedian, especially when partnering with Dave Rogers. So hysterically funny to hear whatever bizarre thought spontaneously pops into their heads. However, while we may justifiably laugh at them, perhaps we should not take that too seriously because, anyway, there is an undercurrent of anger in comedy that is disconcerting on another level. I also noticed that about some other people.

Which Reminds Me

Someone has reminded me of the time that for a moment I got confused at a church, somehow didn't notice the signs and started to walk into the men's bathroom. But there was a man emerging at the time so I really didn't go inside. It was just a momentary confusion, not a permanent thing.

Which Reminds Me

When I was a newspaper reporter I was always very careful to keep it fair and accurate and balanced, so it was rather insulting to have my editor telling me that I didn't write enough like the New Times. I just can't write that way with a clear conscience so it is just as well that I never worked for them.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, it is so annoying, always being mistaken for wicked witch Holly, and all because I quoted something that she said. What does Holly really know about anything? She was just a stupid Psych. major, and as we know from experience, Psych. majors were just the stupidest know-nothing know-it-alls ever.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, while I was at college, I was asked to vote in some special election, so I did. I have no memory of what it was about, just that I voted for something that I really didn't understand. I have no clue to this day what the deal was. And then later someone was saying that all of the people who matter were warned not to vote and that those people whose names were on the voter list would be prosecuted later. Ok, well, thanks for "helping" me with that. I will remember, not forget how you "helped" me in these matters.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, who would have thunk it? That our Christian college newspaper would actually publish the idiotic rantings of Murray? Incredible. How did these trashy people get admitted to our 'Christian' college in the first place? I can imagine some people saying that after reading that garbage, even me. It does boggle the mind that any credibility should be attributed to the idiotic rantings of Murray's brother. They were way out there in the fringe elements of college, not really the mainstream of things. But I digress.

I do not want to be reminded later of Murray's newspaper garbage. I don't care that much.

Which Reminds Me

Now I am remembering that I did have one weird conversation with Ken Miyashiro. These guys think they are so clever with their trick questions. They will say something like, "You think this and this and this, don't you?" And whether I say yes or no, the result is not correct.

I remember that Terry Cederblom was that master of the trick questions. It got to where I would just say yes to any question, meaning "whatever," not because the answer was no either, but because I already know he is not going to bother to listen to me correcting his empty head, and, anyway, I don't want to be bothered to have to do that when, anyway, he really doesn't care. These guys only like to hear themselves talk.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I remember Rodger telling me that there during a Student Council meeting the officers of the board were much disturbed by the noises emanating from the behind a partition, which as it turned out was Ken and Kathy making out. So Rodger was reprimanding me for my slight association to these people even though I cannot be expected to keep track of where they are and what they are doing. I only know what Rodger said about that, nothing more.

Which Reminds Me

And who was that boring Japanese guy, Ken, making out with so publicly all over campus, as some people mentioned, namely Rodger? Um, that was Kathy, who was my roommate at the time, who was Ken's girlfriend. I don't know anything else about it. I cannot be expected to keep track of all these people. I really don't care that much.

Which Reminds Me

Sergio will just be disappointed if he thinks that he is going to pin the cause of Murray's bad behavior on me.

Which Reminds Me

During my last year of college I was rooming with Kathy Murray, who was originally from Miami, although I rarely saw her. She was usually out with her Asian boyfriend, Ken Miyashiro?, although I heard later that she actually married Sergio Rivera. I do recall that she spent long hours in the bathtub when she was there. Her brother's name was Dan Murray, who was writing in the college newspaper. I do recall that he wrote on controversial topics that did not accord with the generally prevailing views of the general student populace of the time, let's just say. I try to be nice to all these miscellaneous people but I really don't know what else happened to them then and later. So?

Which Reminds Me

Shortly after I arrived in Virginia, I remember that one of the first things that Machelle Bush said to me was something about how I would not be invited to the wedding shower of some person unknown to me. I did think that was odd. Why would this gnarly shrub make such a huge effort and expend such energies to disinvite me to a party for someone of whose existence I am entirely unaware? I just have no idea.

Which Reminds Me

Also, we see that someone needs to disabuse the Smiths, we know, of this notion that their word is law, that their few tidbits of information constitute the total sum of human knowledge.

Which Reminds Me

When I went on the desert biology field trip during college there were two science teachers in two different vans. In one van were Cori and her gang of haughty arrogant cliquey snobs. In the other van were myself and some other miscellaneous stray people whose names I cannot recall. Arriving back at the dorm afterwards, Cori announces to me that she group studied with Marilyn and got a 98 A+ on the final exam. No one is saying that Cori is not clever in her own way. And what did I get? Well, I studied alone and got a 92, an A- that will average out to an A on the report card. When I said this, Cori flew into a rage and stormed out of the room. Whatever she did after that point I have no idea. I only know that I indeed did get an A in desert biology on the final report card. So whatever Cori might have said about that behind the scenes matters not to me.

Which Reminds Me

There was some discussion of the actual dictionary definition of the word "slut," but I don't recall myself ever calling someone that directly. But since you have spent so much time elaborating on the subject, we assume that you are insisting on attaching the definition to yourself, so I may be forced to reluctantly agree to call you that anyway, because you earned it.

Which Reminds Me

Perhaps someone forgot to shove the Jenkins riffraff, and especially horrid Cori, down the garbage disposal. I am not going to discuss my personal business with that piece of garbage. And that's final.

Which Reminds Me

Will someone please tell trashy slut Cori to hurry up and butt out of my personal life? I am not going to be donating my inheritance to benefit her snarky horrid family.

Which Reminds Me

So the Jenkins and the Evans should be looking to Marvin for their piece of the pie. As for us on our side of the family, we get nothing as far I know. I really don't know anything about it.

Which Reminds Me

Someone was heard online boasting of the superiority of the Jenkins, probably Marvin, becuase they are Marvin's in-laws. I suppose that means that none of the rest of us get a piece of Marvin's pie. Which only makes common sense. Neither do we have any reason to discuss something with the Evans clan. I am not interested in comparing notes with them. There is just nothing for me to say about that without making someone angry with me for some unspecified reason.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I see that someone needs to disabuse "Mr. Hoskins" of this fanciful notion that I am in any way running for public office, much less that of Attorney General. Just because some clueless band geeks neglected to elect me president of the Musicians Guild, that does not mean that I cared very much about that. I wouldn't necessarily want to be mistaken for the one who was elected. But I digress.

Which Reminds Me

I remember once or twice seeing a Christmas letter that my mother received from Mrs. Nipper, Cori's mother. In there she said something like, "And how are René and Heather?" Ummm. My sister's name is René but there is no Heather at this address. Heather lived next door to me at college one year only. Further proof of how ridiculously stupid these Nippers are. Well, actually, Cori's mother was by birth a Jenkins, another unknown family of no interest to us. Well, actually, after doing some family research, I see that my great-grandfather's brother's wife was also a Jenkins. Whether they are actually Marvin's in-laws I have no idea. Just because Cori's name starts with C, that does not mean that she has my birthmark. So we are just about ready to dump the Jenkins and the Evans in the dustbin of forgetfulness, because life is too short to be expected to keep track of all these distant connections of no importance. Oh, was I supposed to thank them for ruining my life?

Which Reminds Me

I remember that when my mother was in college she worked part-time as an assistant to some horrid rich person who is listed in the Blue Book of Society. I don't know very much else about that. Of course, horrid Cori could never get herself listed in the Blue Book in a million years, especially with her rotten attitude and continual temper tantrums and screaming fits. Cori has no business bossing me around that way, and then "firing" me when I didn't want to be taking orders from her in the servile way she expected, especially when she doesn't pay my salary and is only a Spoiled Rotten District Brat. She is skilled in the art of being a nuisance,  and she is not smart enough to be embarrassed of her own bad behavior.

Agreeing to room with Cori was a huge mistake. No, actually I don't want to make a lifetime commitment to such a horrible person as her. Sometimes so-called "friends" are not worth remembering.

Which Reminds Me

And why is this stupid Faulkner witch always screaming at me? She's got nothing, just a big fat mouth. That's all she's got, just blabbermouth bluff. Just a lot of meaningless chatter. And I am supposed to be intimidated by that? I think that I couldn't care less about the Faulkner idiots. All they have is the distant memories of past Nobel glories, nothing more.

Which Reminds Me

Someone is hinting about my clueless relatives but it is hard to explain that without offending them in the process. Why would my aunt and uncle send their son to a Jewish school? Actually, I have no idea. None of us are Jewish. We are Christian so we don't need that. We already have the Old Testament to some extent and we also have the New Testament, which overcomes an excessive legalism of the Palestinian times, and extends the promises. So we are just fine without that extra stuff, although we recognize that sometimes it is necessary to communicate with the variety of persons in our country who are of other religious systems when we are at work, which is not always so easy as we might have thought.

To confuse matters further, some distant cousin of ours converted to Judaism and married a certain Mr. Israel, a person completely unknown to us. We were not paying attention to Great-Uncle Sam's family so we have no idea what they are doing. Sometimes people get distracted and wander off in other directions and forget who they are. We cannot be expected to keep tabs on every single person in the extended family. Only God can do that.

Which Reminds Me

Someone is reminding me that a song that I was heard to sing as a small child was "Puff the Magic Dragon." And where did I get that? Hmmm.... Might have been my parents who let me watch the TV special which featured that song. I also remember that I once thought I saw a dragon on the wall of my room late at night but then I realized, or else my mother helped me see, that it was only patterns of light from the street lights or passing cars or something that was reflected on the wall. So there was really nothing there.

So was that a problem for someone? I don't understand why anyone would make some huge issue out of that.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, why are these cliquey snobs from Michigan always so full of themselves and not much else? I would prefer not to discuss so much personal business with persons who are mostly strangers to me which is why I would prefer to just use Bible verses, because God's Word everyone can agree on. Everything else is just your uninformed opinion. Didn't your mother ever tell you not to talk to strangers? I always was very reluctant to talk about personal things so why are they throwing out all these personal signals from a distance, as if to lure me? Realistically, they should not be aware of my existence. And yet their signals are filled with personal information that they obviously got from some confused source. Truth be told, I never had any particular fondness for the snobs of Michigan and I resent their attempts to compel me to communicate when obviously they are only going to use anything I say against me. I never had the slightest connection to Michigan. Maybe we could sell Michigan to the Canadians and be rid of these nasty Michiganders.

Which Reminds Me

I suddenly realized that many of these clues are pointing to the "Alice's Restaurant" song by Arlo Guthrie. So now I listen to that song and I see that it does not apply to me so I have nothing to worry about. I was never arrested for littering or anything else for that matter so why all this attitude positioning? All I know is that it can't be my fault, whatever it is. I don't know anything about it.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I don't know why I didn't think it was odd back then to be reminded of something that I had pinned on the bulletin board over my desk when I was in high school. It was a page from a magazine, maybe Campus Life, a photograph of a lightning bolt along with a poem, graphically beautiful I thought, although I cannot recall just now what the poem said. It was mostly I just thought that it was a beautiful photograph. How amazing to capture a lighting strike, small momentary flash in time. But you wouldn't know anything about that. You were never in my room.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, it would be hard for me to imagine a more dreary fate than to spend the rest of my life volunteering for them. All they do is take take take. There they are, always wanting me to buy something from them. Obviously, they never give an inch. They imagine me their slave, to be used to promote basically themselves and their own self-centered glory train. Always throwing boxes at me. Never getting a break. This gets very monotonous,

Which Reminds Me

I don't know if I remember correctly the story about the high school fight of those two boys, but I think she said there were other witnesses besides herself. You might ask the sereno-guard at the school entrance box. Maybe the authorities would know something more about that. You could always ask them.

Which Reminds Me

Why are these people always so mean to me? It doesn't make any sense. Why are they so expectant? I can't be my fault. So obviously you will ultimately fail to make any logical point.

Which Reminds Me

Was that Ann Campbell who was talking about family jewels? I don't remember that very clearly. The other girl was talking about how she was walking maybe on a sidewalk maybe near the school when she saw the two guys fighting, and maybe someone was there also and saw that. She was saying that she does not want to say anything about that so we respect her silence. We don't know anything about it anyway. I am just half a week away from graduating high school and packing to leave the country so obviously I have other things on my mind.

Which Reminds Me

I remember when I was younger at one time I had a small sign that I bought at a gift shop that said "Mental Ward" that I hung in my room until my mother made me throw it away. Yes, it sometimes seems as if I live in some place resembling that. Perhaps there would be a mental hospital somewhere where I could retire from society and thus not have to worry about all this garbage coding, just take sleeping pills and wait to die because that's what this means to me.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, well, maybe I am not perfect, but at least I never married some worthless idiot named Richard Klein of whom nothing is known. Anyway, that was Beverly's mistake, not mine. Better that I remain single than marry Mr. Wrong.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I once threatened to kill my sister because she was so obnoxious but I relented and did not do that. So who is guilty of murder, the one says that they are going to kill but does not kill, or the one who did not say that but did kill? I think that the person who did the killing is the one who should be in prison, not me.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I probably should add to that something about putting a damper on the clanging Bells. I was never so fond of Bruce that I wouldn't be willing to forget about him in order to get on with my life. Why should the Baptists get a special deal just because they forgot something?

Which Reminds Me

Yes, she was just saying that she saw those two guys fighting, from a distance. She was traumatized by the very scary sight apparently, and then someone else was talking about the family jewels and how important that is. Yes, indeed. Uhu. Yes, what a frightening thing to witness.

Which Reminds Me

During the last week of high school I remember that I was talking to someone and they were saying that two guys had gotten into a fight, and also something was said about the family jewels. Did someone hit the family jewels? What were their names? Why were they fighting? I don't know. These were questions that I did not ask. I was mostly just listening to them talk about it and I did not get a clear idea of what they were talking about.

Which Reminds Me

So, anyway, I don't think that there is anything in New York that I need. So what if I don't fit in with some unknown pack of blonde/Viking chatterboxes? I never liked the Tomsons anyway. We certainly did take on quite a few fleas during the one year that we lived in Mexico. Also sometimes I think I hear the Kramers droning in the distance I am not sure. I really don't remember very much about them. Their son's name was Mark. That is one of the few things that I remember about them.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, since you asked, it is true that I have a small birthmark on my upper arm which is not visible most of the time. So I guess this means that I am not perfect enough to meet some people's expectations. However, it's not like it is the mark of Cain or some bizarre thing like that. Some of those people put such a strangely exaggerated meanings to everything about me, as if they are looking for reasons not to like me, which is just another reason to avoid mentioning this minor point, because I would just get in trouble even more if I mentioned their names. And yet one wonders why they are so worked up about nothing much.

Which Reminds Me

And I never even heard of Steve Taylor's skit until just yesterday. Ick! So was I supposed to thank you for shoving that garbage in my face? What a twisted view of reality! Guess what, I do not want to participate in your silly sucking game. Anyway, I would prefer to just ignore that.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, it is sad to see that you are all mindless cloned chips off the old Tomson/Viking Iceberg. Brrrrrrrr! Judy T. is such a fat ugly hog, so faky the way she pretends to be a nice person, but I digress. I always mostly loathed the Thomson girls and hope that I never have to see their horrible faces ever again in this lifetime. They will move home to Washington state so there is no danger of running into them again in Florida. Of course, I am a Christian so I have to pretend to love even though deep down I detest them and do everything I can behind the scenes to make their lives miserable in every way. In other words, it is the other way around, all of this is just a reflection of their undying never-ending hatred for me.