Which Remembers Me

Someone is begging me to ask why a megaphone was given to that Arab weasel Tony from high school journalism class. He begged to see my project so now I have to apologize for showing it to him. Anyway, it was not like I needed his input on the subject.

Which Reminds Me

I seem to remember Miriam Denham trumpeting loudly her intentions to write a book someday. Whether she ever did that I cannot say. Certainly I have not yet seen her name churning up in the annals of Amazon. However, I don't recall myself commenting on Miriam's remark because that would be unwise when, who knows, maybe someday I might want to reserve that option for myself, not that I would ever discuss that with Miriam. Many books are written by women as well as men. I am not aware of any rule forbidding me to write a book so the histrionics on this point are overwrought in the extreme.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, you only wish that my name was Linda Sease. She does look sort of whitish and also sort of darkish, could pass for an American or not, one or the other, but I really couldn't tell you what she actually is. She was in high school with us but her photo does not appear in the senior yearbook, I really couldn't tell you why not. Perhaps her family moved away and she graduated somewhere else. Anyway, it wouldn't be polite to jump to unwarranted conclusions about people's grade point averages or other personal circumstances unknown to me when that is not my job. Am I the high school counselor that I should know these things? If they want to volunteer the information when asked, or are honored on that basis, then fine, but otherwise I think it is better to not ask too many questions or you might be sorry that you asked in the first place.

Which Reminds Me

I think it not presumptuous to consider myself too much college educated and intelligent to spend the rest of my life flipping burgers in some fast food joint, never mind the ill-informed opinion of some nattering nabob of negativity. I do like alliterations so much. How do they come up with these fast food puns, one after another, and I never even said anything to denigrate fast food workers. To each his own.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, who can forget Bobby Bueno saying that he could not imagine marrying someone who wasn't beautiful. I don't why it is that I happened to overhear that but obviously someone knows that I did. Truth be told, I really don't care that much about who Bobby dates or marries. I really don't know the Bueno family very well anymore and don't care if I never see them again because I wouldn't want to overhear something that could be problematic for me. It doesn't matter what it is. If I overheard something they want to know even if I had completely forgotten and couldn't care less, and in some cases I wasn't even there and don't know anything about it. The truth is that I just won't be available for further discussion.

Which Reminds Me

I am not from Michigan or Ohio or Hawaii or Louisiana so why are all these snarky horrible Michigander people shooting at me? They are not invited to my house. I really would not care to comment further. Anyway, I never claimed to be a Spanish major in college, unlike Pammie-Puke. You could always ask her why that matters now.

Which Reminds Me

I remember hearing that some people at Life Publishers confronted the president, Bob Hoskins, on his cooking of the financial books. I really don't know the details of that because, for one thing, I was already gone by that time, and also, no one ever offered to me a detailed account of those events that I could possibly recount, only some vague hints. You could always ask Pammie-Puke. She probably knows more about that than I do.

Which Reminds Me

I believe that I declined the offer of a date with that weaselly little creep from Louisiana, Randy Gay, a janitor at McDonald's and a student of Max's Bible class, who speaks with a Cajun lisp, when he had the nerve to call me at my house, because I had been the first to greet him upon his first visit to the single adult meeting at church. And later he was seen dating a tiny girl who probably was more his type anyway which is just as well because I just wasn't interested but I had been just trying to be friendly as I felt instructed by social duty. And yet Pammie-Puke had the nerve to criticize me for turning down his request for a date and went on about how you never know about how a guy might be a nice guy after all if you accept the date, as she was not all that interested when I had introduced her to Craig but they were married soon after. But I had already refused him so any further discussion of Randy Gay and Louisiana is a moot point. Louisiana is a place of no interest to me. I will never live there and I don't care about whatever happened to Randy Gay, a person of no interest to me.

Which Reminds Me

You have wrongly accused me of cooking the books. You are confused. Obviously you have mistaken me for Pammie-Puke of Michigan, a co-worker who clearly always did have some huge chip on her shoulder against me for some mysterious reason. It was Pammie-Puke, who majored in Spanish at a college of snarky-mean Michiganders, who spent considerable time in Spain, several months or a year, studying Spanish there, although she said herself that she cannot really understand what she is reading in Spanish, and even found herself a Spanish boyfriend while there. As for myself, I never claimed to set foot in Spain. I can say that I have read books by authors of Spain but I have never been there myself, noever r claimed to go there. So obviously I would not be qualified to comment on Spain myself. I am from neither Ohio nor Hawaii, nor have I ever claimed to know why you Michigander snipers hate me so much. You are just ridiculous. I despise you for that reason.

Which Reminds Me

All of this talk about languages reminds me of Mindy Anderson, a co-worker many years ago when I was living in California working at Lockman Foundation. Mindy had studied linguistics in college under some famous linguist, although I don't recall whether she mentioned his name, and she was saying some interesting things about linguistics, which is always somewhat interesting to anyone who knows two or more languages. If you only know one language then you really wouldn't understand, most likely. Which reminds me that one of our supervisors, Dr. Giacumakis, was working in the loft above us and perhaps overheard some of the bizarre things that Mindy was saying about theology, although he was gone for two or three weeks visiting his relatives in Greece on his way to or from some type of Bible training place in Israel. Which reminds me of Dr. Giacumakis mentioning that Spanish is about 40 percent derived from the Arabic or did he say Aramaic? Which seems odd because one is often told that Spanish is a Latin-based language, but perhaps not entirely.

Which Reminds Me

Why all this silly chatter about killing the golden goose, or the goose that laid the golden eggs? I really don't understand where that comes from. I really am not the maker of fables but anyway you Italians are the ones who worship the silver goose as a god, while we Americans would prefer to eat the bird, although here actually we would prefer to feast on turkey, truth be told, and leave silly street processions to those idolatrous Catholics whose understanding is not yet perfected. Perhaps you would prefer silvery jewelry to gold because it complements yourself, or you are invested in silver mines, while I would prefer gold, not that I have any investment there. It's just that, well, to each his own. Freedom means that you should not be allowed to hold me hostage to your silly points. Our culture suggests to us through magazine pictures and ads that we need jewelry, but we can live without it, truth be told. We can live without gold or silver but it is not possible to live without money, the circulation that gives us the power to buy and sell. Without circulation we would just die.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I am suddenly reminded of something that I read about my great-great-grandfather John Brownlow McClellan, who in 1849 was elected County Tax Assessor and Collector for Fayette County, Texas. He was elected by a unanimous vote of the county commissioners but things went downhill after that. I only know what is already written down in our family history book so it would be useless to quiz me on that subject. All you need to do is read the book. I really have no idea. There is nothing that I could possibly add to that.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, it is true that my mother has talked about our family's feeling of being on the way out. We are leaving because they don't need us. It's not just that they don't need us. They don't want us. Who doesn't want us? Well, it is rather awkward when one's own relatives are sometimes the worst enemies ever imagined. The Bible says: "No one serving as a soldier gets entangled in civilian affairs, but rather tries to please his commanding officer." We as Christians are in a sense serving in the "salvation" army of a sort. Our commanding officer is not present at the moment but still we seek to live our lives to please the Lord of hosts. Yet sometimes one's relatives can be very meddlesome and interfering in what one thinks one ought to do and what they think one ought to do. So life is complicated. And if honoring one's father and mother is a problem to some third or fourth cousin living in some other state, well tough. Ultimately, we don't care that much about what "they" think. We have to do what God commands. We have to follow God's will even though sometimes our distant in-laws may have other bizarre ideas with which we may not be in agreement if we are even aware of their existence. We might not appreciate them trying to remotely impose their will upon us when actually their opinions are not very important in the whole scheme of things.

Which Reminds Me

You have a lot of nerve trying to throw me into the terrorist camp when actually I never would have been there if my sister hadn't dragged me along. She never was shy about taking up with whoever was conveniently there at the time, not that I would know anything about those people. Perhaps you know more about them than I ever did. They always liked her and hated me without saying so in so many words.

Which Reminds Me

I always was such a kind and gentle person in high school so it boggles the mind that anyone would accuse me of not being nice. I was such a nice person always, except for perhaps some occasions for the interest of self-defense. And yet all of these people persist in being so mean to me. It is incredible that I should be accused of anything after enduring this continual onslaught of garbage accusations from complete strangers who obviously are only interested in killing me to steal my inheritance. All they want is the oil rights which is why it is wise never to mention that to anyone. Gas and oil people are the most horrid murderers who cannot be trusted with any personal information.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, that was so rude of Susie not to invite me to her wedding. And I could have easily attended had I been invited, but I wasn't. So whatever. Anyway, I guess that saves me the trouble of having to spend money on a wedding present for her which she would not appreciate anyway. I can just count them out and spend all of the money on myself because, anyway, I certainly can't count on them to give me a break.

Which Reminds Me

Several years ago I once called Miriam who lives in the next county and she barely remembered who I was. She did say that she had recently applied for a job at that Hoskins place and went on and on about how wonderful she thinks they are, how wonderful what they are doing with all their money and so forth. They did not have a place for her to go back to but they did pray with her before she left. So she made sound very nice the way she talks. Yes, well, Miriam always was very funny. I don't how how she can think of all these funny things to say.

Which Reminds Me

Someone was saying that Miriam is very off-color in her humor. I think that it was maybe Sue who was saying that, and, well, I cannot exactly disagree with Sue on that point when actually she is correct in saying so even if Miriam does have a very quick wit and is sometimes funny in a sick sort of way. Sometimes Miriam does get carried away and does not seem to have any consciousness of how over the edge she actually is. But I guess that Miriam can get away with that sort of behavior because she knows shorthand and qualifies as an executive secretary, whereas I never did take the time to learn shorthand so obviously I cannot get away with saying anything of that sort. I would just be killed if I said even a hint of the things that come out of Miriam's weird mouth. So she is funny to listen to but I would not want to have to vomit anything that Miriam said. In addition to knowing shorthand, Miriam also hails from a swamp known as Louisiana, a scary place nowadays given what I have learned about it.

Which Reminds Me

Oh, is that the Lange sisters I hear barking somewhere in the background? Whatever. Obviously some friendships don't really mean very much looking back. Bye.

Which Reminds Me

I remember at age 15 being somewhat annoyed with Sammy because he was refusing to acknowledge myself an individual with an identity separate from my sister. He would address us jointly always, so why should I answer his question when it was not addressed to me specifically? But my sister would often jump in and answer the question addressed partly to me which made it impossible to get that point cleared up. His twin sister married that somewhat repulsive toad Buzz of whom nothing is known other than they all have the same surname. So whatever. Should we make the poor hungry people to suffer because of their benefactors' antagonistic bent? No. I really see no reason to take the antagonistic bait offered. Just because Buzz doesn't know me from Miriam, that is not a reason for me to try to explain what I really don't know about her. You could always ask Susie. Susie might remember details of that as she might also know more about the unspeakably despicable things that the Spanish people did to Myrna Wilkins, a single woman missionary in Colombia or Venezuela, one of those South America countries. Ok, so she was discovered to be shaving her legs as many white American women do. Uh-huh. Ok, so whatever.

Which Reminds Me

The snarky stupid Walker bunch sure are making a lot of noise, quite a hullaballoo, about their own self-important pomposity. So one would think that they would be grateful to their stepmother for immortalizing their grandiose impression of their own self-important attitude by writing a book about themselves, "Peruvian Gold," in which she pointedly presents the missionaries of Peru as the "gold standard" of missionaries, whereas the rest of us are apparently considered by them to be of a lower sort of materials, only silver or bronze or iron or perhaps even brick. Well, whatever. We had not even noticed that there was an argument to be made on these points until they began their impetuous squealing, so obviously we have yet to be favorably impressed with the Walker whiners.

Which Reminds Me

It makes my life very awkward and miserable to have the horrid snarky stupid Walker family blindsiding me with their bizarre attempt to attach me to their miserable existence in Peru. The Walkers are pathetically horrid people to whom I am not even slightly connected. The Walkers wish to perpetuate through me a clandestine war against Luisa Jeter Walker, who was their stepmother, a single missionary woman in Peru who snagged their widowed missionary father. But I do not wish to participate in their stupid existence. I don't even know these people, only met her once or twice, so really I wish they would all just go away and leave me to find my own life. I never realized until quite recently what a bunch of snarky losers the South America people actually were. I had not really been around them so really would not be able to comment. Guess what? I actually don't care about the whiners of Ecuador and Peru. I would not think of meddling behind the scenes in their lives and I would appreciate the same consideration.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, I always hated this idea of myself being a goldfish swimming around on display in someone's goldfish bowl. Coincidentally, when I was in college my roommate Cori had a goldfish bowl which she regularly kept clean so as to avoid the water going cloudy. Yes, well, if the fish had a name I don't recall what it was. I was the other human being in the room, the one who rebelled against the idea of Cori being my boss and barking orders at me. No, just because Cori was aiming to make herself a manager at the local Del Taco fast food establishment where she worked at the time, that did not make her college roommate an employee of that same fast food place. I should not even have to explain these obvious points but these people are so amazingly dense, so obstinately determined to be utterly insulting and to make my life utterly miserable in whatever way then can. And tackling their stupid points only ties up my time in unproductive ways, thus leaving me trapped in the fishbowl and unable to escape the wickedness of these buzzards picking at my bones.

Which Reminds Me

Not long before I left school I was walking across campus and ran into Sandra who told me she would soon be marrying a Catholic. Her sister Cynthia was not there at the time so she might not know about that. So there was not much for me to say about that as not many details were offered. Anyway, some persons were confused. We are not related in any family way to the Smiths or the Santiagos so it is hard for us to understand why we are still hearing about these minor details so many years later.

Which Reminds Me

I should be asking why the riff-raff idiots of Michigan are swarming around us like flies, stinging like bees, as if I could ever be impressed by their unbelievable stupidity, as if they should be surprised that the seeds they planted in the first place should be bearing fruit now. But I really can't say anything nice about Ohio either. So perhaps there is nothing for me but Toledo.

Which Reminds Me

How can you not know that David is a disgusting little weasel? Why are you trying to attach David? You should know that public warnings have gone out about David so you really should beware of sharing any personal information with him. There is no telling how your information might be twisted to suit some hidden and nefarious purposes that are not so apparent on the surface. You should know that David would not be shy about sharing all of your personal information with the Devil himself and the Bible tells us that the Devil is a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. David might try to make you feel guilty about not sharing everything with him but remember that we are hidden in Christ. We put on the righteousness of Christ. We wear the righteousness of Christ as a garment. We put on the garment of praise that we may be protected from the snares and wiles of the enemy. So enough said about that.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, it is a bit awkward to have these rather fat and ugly Santiago dogs trying to position themselves as vampire seductresses having stolen every available male on the planet by virtue of being willing to go farther when actually we all know that these ugly girls generally get so desperate that they will go for whatever slobbering idiot they can get, which basically describes the fat ugly girl complex. Thus we heard Sandra saying that she married outside her religion, a Catholic, because probably she was desperate and what else could an ugly duckling like her expect, after all? I never met him and don't know anything else about him, but knowing what a fat ugly dog Sandra always was, I can imagine that he also would be a tedious and uninteresting bore. So I must apologize for this lousy script but someone was obviously expecting me to say this about her. Really I don't care what she does. Just because we graduated from the same college, that does not mean that we really care that much what the dull and dreary Santiagos do. Whatever. We wisely know to avoid those brown bores like the plague.

Which Reminds Me

Yes, it is rather awkward for me to have these Spanish people such as the Santiago people posing as victims of me when actually it is the other way around, and besides they are actually Portuguese which I had not been aware of. I never really understood what their attitude problem was but I do get that they would just kill me if it were up to them. Eventually they would just kill off all of the white Protestants such as me and then the whole world will just be darkly Catholic. At least that is their plan as far as I can see. Which plan stinks in my opinion but whatever. But anyway, I probably wouldn't live long enough to see the end result of their intrigues. I would just be dead long before the actual plan is fully implemented.

Which Reminds Me

During high school in El Salvador my family had membership in something killed the "Club Del Prado." It was located in Colonia Escalón and its amenities included an Olympic size swimming pool, patio area with snack bar, tennis courts, a building that could be rented for parties although we never did that, and a room with foosball, air hockey and other such games. As far as I can recall it was strictly a recreational thing. There was nothing ethnic about it that I can recall. We often went there on Saturdays and summers mainly to go swimming although we may have played tennis and foosball a few times also. There were no books involved at our club. Some other Americans also were seen there at times. There were other similar membership clubs in the city perhaps with more and better amenities but ours we thought was one of the less expensive of this sort of thing that become available to us somehow, I don't quite recall how we got started there but it was nice to have some place to go as long as my parents paid their dues. Perhaps my parents remember something about that. Anyway, when I returned to the country a few years ago to visit someone was saying that our former club had later been transformed into a private club for Arab people so we can no longer revisit that place, ourselves not being Arabs. Oh, I had not known about that. It was certainly not an Arab club at the time that we lived there. Anyway, I never really had any inside information about the ownership of the Club Del Prado at any time. For us it was just a place to go swimming so I fail to comprehend the need for all of these bizarre lexicographical gymnastics. However, I do recall Bobby Bueno trying to use that in some political way, making some snarky comments about us being "club" people in order to position himself as a "non-club" person, the Buenos having not been members of the club, only guests of ours on various occasions, even though he knows very well that it was not that kind of club. Interestingly, Bobby also mentioned that after we had left the country he and his brothers sometimes gained illegal admission to the club by virtue of the guard recognizing their faces and waving them in even though they were really never paid members. So it does sort of rankle me that these people are using club cards in whichever way is to their advantage of the moment depending on whoever they are talking to, in other words talking out of both sides of their mouths.

Which Reminds Me

I am suddenly reminded of my Spanish language studies in high school. I remember hearing the name of famous Spanish dramatist Lope de Vega but I do not recall having actually studied any of his works specifically. The box does contain a copy of Calderón de la Barca's "Life is a Dream," but my sister's name is on this book so that was probably her book. However, the fact that my reading list does not exactly correspond to hers or yours is an irrelevant point. I may have read some other books that you never thought of reading. Who knows? Who cares? Just because our reading lists do not exactly match, that does not mean that only your voice counts for anything. I do remember reading that 1977 book by Sheldon Vanauken, "A Severe Mercy," which I remember discussing with Carol Long, but I disagree that his point was of marital compatibility consisting entirely of matched reading lists. I think that my reading list is really none of your business. It is a personal thing between me and God.

Anyway, getting an education is not a matter of rote and memorized reading lists. It is more about being able to get at the information that is needed when it is needed regardless of whatever your high school reading list was, although reading does help in that regard.