Which Reminds Me

Yes, how well I remember Barbara Wilder in sixth grade talking about herself being flatfooted in addition to wearing a size D shoe. As for myself, I could never hope to fill the shoes of this D-feeted Barbara, who as I recall had long red hair, a lighter red than my auburnish. There were three of us redheads in sixth grade at the MK school: Barbara, Sammy, and me. But the fourth sixth grader, and there were four of us in sixth grade that year, was brownish haired Dawn. The Davenports were away on furlough that year so blonde Cheryl was out of the country. So anyway, you will never succeed in this effort of D-feeting me, you pompous old windbag, always so full of hot air. My feet were never that wide. So yours are quite the bizarre gymnastic contortions, perhaps a failed effort to pretend that Dawn Saword was ever somehow Pentecostal when actually the Sawords were quite the reverse, quite anti-Pentecostal. Just because we all attended the same school, that does not mean that we ever agreed on certain points of doctrinal purity. The Sawords actually belonged to a tiny exclusivist cult that is extremely legalistic and severe. The Sawords taught that women should never cut their hair and girls never wear pants or wear makeup of any kind, etc. etc., because they interpret certain Bible verses very literally. So we respected their right to live as they chose but as for me, I could not live under that sort legalism. I did wear pants even though a girl because, anyway, it was the 20th century and we interpret that in a different way. (Barbara Wilder and her brother, 8th grader Jeff, were Central American Mission, which is sort of like Baptist, not Pentecostal.) So just because these people were with us in school, that does not mean that they are of us. Just because in college I remember one roommate talked about attending the Crystal Cathedral, also attended by her then-boyfriend, also a college classmate, that does not mean that I ever attended any Dutch Reformed Church ever in my lifetime, only one time and only because the college choir sang there one Sunday morning. Otherwise, I have no connection whatever to the Dutch Reformed thing. Perhaps Professor Elliott, a music teacher at our college, attended there regularly, given that his son Chris was into organ music, and our churches cannot offer much in the way of organ music to speak of. But otherwise I have really no idea why these Dutch Reformed busybodies would imagine themselves connected to us. They might be Christians but they are certainly not Pentecostals. Not that we would not them to become Pentecostals later if so inclined but they have not been properly trained so they obviously have no clue what they are talking about. They are not very good listeners.