Which Reminds Me

Yes, you seem to be reminding me of the crystal egg. Why are my so-called friends giving me all of this doggie-dyke garbage? A crystal egg? It makes we think they are not so bright after all. They don't seem to understand how sexy I might have been or even still be if encountered by True Love/Mr. Right's kiss. There are no guarantees in life, and yes, I know some believe that a girl might have to kiss a few toads and/or frogs before Prince Charming finally appears on the scene. Nevertheless, I never did see any reason to bestow any such honors on those repulsive toadies Bobby and David and Max. Some repulsive toadies are best left to frolic in their swampy ecosystems without interference from me. Sorry about that. Nevertheless, there are some things too personal to be discussed with stupid doggie dykes named Linda and Donna and Haulie, a flaky New Age guru now living in Oregon. Anyway, what was I supposed to do with that crystal egg? If I still have that, its two halves might be stored away in some junk drawer or shoebox. I don't quite remember why I should care about that, and yes, perhaps I am too lazy to mail things back to their donors and thus compound the insult. It just wasn't that important to me.