Sad Stories

We were sold into slavery by the great Sultan-Pastor after we failed to pay tribute to the whiny blond lady who was always screaming in our faces and making us feel stupid. In a way it was a relief not to have those Scandinavian blond ladies always hovering around pretending to be friendly when we all knew that they would be stabbing us in the back later and that anything we might or might not say would be used against us. Then they locked the Bible away in a museum and said that it really wasn't true, all that crazy stuff in the Bible about how they were supposed to be equipping all the saints for ministry, dismissing the Apostle Paul's direction as if just another of my Dad's corny cliches. No, they said, ministry is really not for all the saints. Ministry is only for a few lucky people of their choosing. Ministry is limited and conditional. Ministry is restricted to certain personality types, certain ethnic groups, certain levels of affluence and education and network connections. Not only had we made too many mistakes, stepped on too many toes, spoken our minds a time or two in the wrong company, but we also had failed to lie and dissimulate and pretend that these things had never happened. You see, we admitted our guilt. We admitted that we were born sinners and that we were redeemed only by God's grace, which is a big no-no in their book, whatever that book title may be. To them, any admission of guilt is viewed as a sign of weakness to be exploited whether now or later. They mainly pride themselves on having fooled us and tricked us into thinking of them as the persons in charge when originally they were not, their reasoning being that if they condition us to think of them as the ones in charge, then effectively they will be in charge even if it wasn't supposed to be that way. They work their will by sheer force of exploitation. They are power grabbers, one might say.